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Writing Samples
Band 5

In many countries, the government prioritizes economic growth above all other concerns. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of this.

#countries #government #prioritizes #growth #concerns
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Economic
growth
 receives more attention than other concerns from the governments in many states all over the world.
This
 essay will develop into pros and cons of
this
 prioritization. Economic
growth
 has a significant impact on various aspects of society, as is obvious. It provides higher currency values, which means households have higher purchasing power.
Furthermore
, Economic development will lead to new employment opportunities for job seekers, and
consequently
, the unemployment rate will decrease. The
growth
 of economic indices is directly related to the development of businesses, which requires more workforce. To encourage
labor
Change the spelling
labour
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 to join, revenues will be competitive. On the flip side, attempts at economic
growth
 can steer countries towards a competitive environment among governments where some challenges can emerge, like air pollution and over-mining.
For example
, To become dominant suppliers in the global market, countries may start building industrial cities to export merchandise and mine more than usual. Industrialization boosts global warming, and over-mining faces future generations with natural resource
Fix the agreement mistake
shortages
show examples
shortage
Fix the agreement mistake
shortages
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.
To sum up
,
however
 statements priority in economic
growth
 enhances the income and welfare of societies in various ways, like by providing job openings and greater purchasing power for individuals, but It can cause other problems in the long term
such
 as global warming, which ensues from industrialization, and resource shortage in the future
as a result
 of mining.
Submitted by ali.homayoni93 on

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Supporting Examples
Provide specific examples or data to support your arguments for both the advantages and disadvantages of prioritizing economic growth. This will make your essay more persuasive and comprehensible.
Cohesion
Consider using a wider range of linking words and phrases to enhance the flow between ideas and paragraphs.
Task Response Depth
Try to explore the topic more deeply by discussing the impacts on different sectors such as health, education, and social equality. This will give your essay a more comprehensive view of the topic.
Introduction & Conclusion
Your essay introduction and conclusion are clearly presented, effectively setting the stage and summarizing the main points.
Balanced Argument
You've successfully outlined both the advantages and disadvantages, maintaining a balanced discussion throughout the essay.
Logical Structure
The structure of your essay is logical, with a clear progression of ideas from introduction to conclusion.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • prioritizes
  • economic growth
  • employment opportunities
  • public services
  • tax revenues
  • infrastructure development
  • environmental degradation
  • industrial expansion
  • income inequality
  • wealth accrues
  • neglect
  • social issues
  • metrics
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