Some poeple think universities should provide graduates with the knowledge and skills needed in the workplace. Others think that the true function of a university should be to give access to knowledge for its own sake, regardless of whether the course is useful to an employer. what, in your opinion, should be the main function of a university?

#poeple #universities #graduates #skills #workplace #function #university #access #sake #course #employer

Some individuals believe that

universities

should consider the preparation process to

work

market

by giving

graduates

the knowledge and skills they need,

while

others support the

view point

Correct your spelling

viewpoint

show examples

that the main function of

universities

is to teach them the traditional curriculums. I would agree with the first trend, and I will elaborate on my opinion with relevant examples.

Firstly

, those who opine that

universities

should focus on providing learners with knowledge that will qualify them to obtain their certificates ignore

that

Correct determiner usage

the

show examples

fact that the

work

market

eligiabilty

Correct your spelling

eligibility

is of paramount importance,

for instance

, in Egypt, giant companies do not hire fresh

graduates

as they do not have the sufficient experience

thay

Correct your spelling

they

need,

however

many of them have studied full four years in university, and

as a result

of that many of fresh

graduates

are forced to

work

in different fields to gain experience.

Moreover

work

readiness should begin at

early

Add an article

an early

show examples

age before getting the degree,

therefore

educational organizations are not only for studies

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

but

also

for

work

preparation

Secondly

recent

Add an article

a recent

show examples

analysis of the

unemployement

Correct your spelling

unemployment

rate showed that the

gape

Correct your spelling

gap

show examples

is quite wide between the courses that undergraduates study at

universities

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

and the actual

work

market

knowelege

Correct your spelling

knowledge

For example

, some curriculums still teach old methods of

work

such

as booking financial transactions in sheets,

whereas

companies now are using software,

therefore

youth are not

quilfied

Correct your spelling

qualified

to integrate

Change the preposition

into

with

show examples

workforce

Add an article

the workforce

show examples

as lack of basic knowledge they need. If

universities

consider

work

Correct article usage

the work

show examples

readiness issue, many

graduates

will not suffer from

unemployement

Correct your spelling

unemployment

. In conclusion,

although

studying has been the main function of

universities

for decades, they have a vital role to play nowadays.

preparaing

Correct your spelling

Preparing

graduates

for

work

Correct article usage

the work

show examples

market

should be one of

Correct article usage

the universities

show examples

universities

Fix the agreement mistake

university

show examples

basic roles.

Submitted by abdoo.magicoo on Sat Apr 27 2024

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Example Development

You've done a good job of outlining your stance on this issue and backing it up with relevant examples. However, consider expanding on your examples to more vividly illustrate how they support your argument.

Coherence

To enhance coherence, try to make smoother transitions between your paragraphs and sentences. This can be achieved by using a wider variety of linking words and phrases.

Balanced Perspective

Ensure that your essay keeps a balanced view if required by the task. While you have efficiently presented your opinion, reflecting briefly on the opposing viewpoint could further strengthen your argument.

Structure

Your essay has a clear structure, with a discernible introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion, which aids in the reader's understanding.

Example Usage

You have successfully illustrated the main theme with appropriate examples and explanations.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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13Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
20Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

281 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

Workforce preparation
Career readiness
Employability skills
Intellectual growth
Critical thinking
Pursuit of knowledge
Professional training
Liberal arts education
Comprehensive education
Career aspirations
Personal development
Intellectual curiosity

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Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

In some countries, more people are becoming interested in finding out about the history of the house or building they live in. What are the reasons for this? How can people research this question?

Some people argue that exams put too much pressure on university students, but others think that dealing with pressure is an essential skill to develop before people begin employment. Discuss both sides of the argument and present your opinion.

The media has become too influential in peoples lives today and this is a negative development. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.