IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The chart above shows the number of people visiting museums in London in the 5 months in 2021.

The chart above shows the number of people visiting museums in London in the 5 months in 2021.
The bar chart illustrates the number of
people
Use synonyms
visited
Correct pronoun usage
who visited
show examples
 museums in
United
Correct article usage
the United
show examples
 Kingdom in the 5 months
in
Change preposition
of
show examples
 2021.
Overall
Linking Words
 it is noticeable that ,
highest
Add an article
the highest
show examples
 number for the British museum .
In contrast
Linking Words
 ,
lowest
Add an article
the lowest
show examples
 number of
people
Use synonyms
 for
National
Correct article usage
the National
show examples
museum
Capitalize word
Museum
show examples
. In the
month
Fix the agreement mistake
months
show examples
 of June and July , over 400,000
people
Use synonyms
 visited ,
increase
Wrong verb form
increasing
show examples
 drastically following
month
Correct article usage
the month
show examples
August
Change preposition
of August
show examples
 to 600,000 and
dropped
Wrong verb form
dropping
show examples
 to below 300,000 in September and December respectively. On
Correct article usage
the
show examples
other hand ,
National
Change preposition
in National
show examples
 museums, below 200,000
people
Use synonyms
 visit in the 4 months .
Scince
Correct your spelling
Science
 museum
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
fluctuation over four months ,
starts
Wrong verb form
starting
show examples
 with around 400,1000 visits in June slightly
decrease
Wrong verb form
decreasing
show examples
following
Correct article usage
the following
show examples
 month and
remained
Wrong verb form
remaining
show examples
 unchanged in July and August with 400 000 . And grew upto 500 000 in September , decline to 300 000 in December.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
▼
Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Replace the words people with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "number of" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: