advanteges and disadvantages of playing video games for children
Nowadays
children
around the world have their own cutting edge
devices and enjoy a Add a hyphen
cutting-edge
lot
of games
or virtual reality games
. Entire world parents tend to give children
devices and be
more free time for their leisure. Verb problem
have
This
essay give
information about Change the verb form
gives
benefits
and drawbacks of playing Correct article usage
the benefits
video
games
for children
.
On the one hand
Add a comma
hand,
this
habit or addict
can be the most Replace the word
addiction
destroying
matter for Replace the word
destructive
children
future Change noun form
children's
life
. Because when Fix the agreement mistake
lives
children
spend a lot
of time playing games
they are losing
Wrong verb form
lose
toch
with real life and in other cases Correct your spelling
touch
their
forget to study school subjects, have Correct pronoun usage
they
not
outdoor activities, and Correct your spelling
no
their
get more introverted. Change the pronoun
they
Moreover
, their
could be more Correct pronoun usage
they
anger
, Replace the word
angry
anxious
and when Correct word choice
and anxious
their
lose touch with real life Correct pronoun usage
they
their
can get some punishment. Correct pronoun usage
they
For example
, brother
killed Correct article usage
the brother
him
little baby sister when she Correct pronoun usage
his
cry
a Wrong verb form
cried
lot
.
On the other hand
balanced playing video
Change preposition
of video
games
more
useful for Add a missing verb
is more
childrens
cognitive and Change noun form
children's
psycologycal
Correct your spelling
psychological
system
. Fix the agreement mistake
systems
Due to
a lot
of hand works
in Fix the agreement mistake
work
brain
of Add an article
the brain
young
generation will get a Add an article
the young
lot
of neiron
Correct your spelling
neuron
link
and Change to a plural noun
links
this
can be
Verb problem
have
more
beneficial effect Add an article
a more
for
Change preposition
on
children
Change noun form
children's
body
. Some Fix the agreement mistake
bodies
video
games
can help relaxing to
Wrong verb form
relax
children
or open thier
emotional state and it is Correct your spelling
their
common
useful for Change the adjective
commonly
children
Change noun form
children's
psycological
health.
In conclusion, virtual activities Correct your spelling
psychological
such
as a
Correct the article-noun agreement
video games
a video game
video
games
can be more useful or can be destroyed if do
not Verb problem
they are
be
balanced.Verb problem
apply
Submitted by nobleness94 on
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structure
Ensure you maintain a clear and logical structure throughout your essay, making your arguments easy to follow.
content
Work on integrating more specific examples to strengthen your arguments. This will enhance the persuasiveness and depth of your essay.
grammar
Pay attention to your spelling, grammar, and punctuation to avoid errors that can distract from your message.
conclusion
Consider expanding on your conclusion to more effectively summarize your points and reinforce your stance on the topic.
content
You've clearly addressed both advantages and disadvantages of playing video games, showcasing a balanced view.
structure
Your introduction and conclusion are present and provide a general overview and closure to your essay, helping to frame your discussion.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.