You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. Write about the following topic: In many countries people have to pay for medical care, but some think that it should be a free service provided by the government. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge and experience. Write at least 250 words.

#minutes #topic #countries #people #care #think #service #government

It is common for

people

to pay for healthcare in various nations.

However

, some argue that

government

Correct article usage

the government

show examples

should

detail

Verb problem

ensure

show examples

that all

people

could

Wrong verb form

can

show examples

be taken

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

medical

care

for free payment. In

this

essay

Add a comma

essay,

show examples

I will explain why I disagree with

this

medical free payment argument.

To begin

with, there is an advantage for many individuals because everyone

could

Wrong verb form

can

show examples

take medical

care

, even if they don't have enough

incomes

Fix the agreement mistake

income

show examples

. These days, some

people

avoid medications because of their financial

problem

Fix the agreement mistake

problems

show examples

and only

wealthy

Correct article usage

the wealthy

show examples

can see

doctor

Add an article

a doctor

the doctor

show examples

when they are

illness

Replace the word

ill

show examples

As a result

this

leads

inequality

Change preposition

to inequality

show examples

of lives between

wealthy

Correct article usage

the wealthy

show examples

and poverty class. But recently,

this

financial unfair problem

Verb problem

has

show examples

not so serious because there are a lot of

insuranses

Correct your spelling

insurance

insurances

services in many countries.

Then

, I believe that there are some disadvantages here.

Firstly

, demands could exceed provides.

For example

, in Canada, which provides free medical

care

, there are always numerous

people

in hospitals and they should wait for a long time if they seem to be in severe situations. Under

this

Correct determiner usage

these

show examples

circumstances, the quality of

care

could decrease because of

lack

Correct article usage

the lack

show examples

of doctors.

In addition

tax

Fix the agreement mistake

taxes

show examples

must be sored to maintain

this

free payment system, and there is no doubt that it

make

Change the verb form

makes

show examples

citizen's lives more challenging. In conclusion, I don't think government should provide a free medical service.

Change preposition

apply

show examples

some nations have already started, but they have faced disadvantages and I believe that

insurance

Correct article usage

the insurance

show examples

system can solve difficulties for poor

people

Submitted by mayu1022.p on Sun Apr 28 2024

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task achievement

Your essay provides a clear standpoint on the topic, but could further enhance its argument by expanding on the relevant examples to strengthen the points made. Try to include more detailed examples from real-life situations or studies.

coherence cohesion

The organization of ideas is logical, but transitions between them can be improved for smoother flow. Consider using a wider range of linking words and phrases to better connect ideas and paragraphs.

grammar

There were small inaccuracies in grammar and spelling within your essay. Practice on refining your grammar usage and double-check your writing for spelling errors to enhance clarity and professionalism.

content

You presented a balanced view by discussing both advantages and disadvantages of free medical care.

structure

Your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, neatly bookending your discussion.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
21Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

243 words

<40

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

In some places old age is valued, while in other cultures youth is considered more important. Discuss both view and give your opinion.

In some countries the average weight of people is increasing and their levels of health and fitness are decreasing. What do you think are the causes of these problems and what measures could be taken to solve them.

The movement of people from agricultural areas to cities to work can cause serious problems in both places. What are the serious problems and what measures can be taken to solve this problem? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Learning out the past has no value for those of us living in the present. To what extent do you agree or disagree?