Information technology enables many people to do their work outside their workplace. Do the benefit of this mobility out where the disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Technological advancements and cutting-edge
gagdets'
creation have brought many advantages to human beings, one of the foremost Correct your spelling
gadgets
is
remote work. Wrong verb form
being
For
this
reason, many people argue that working from home has many advantages that should be leveraged, while
many others think that drawbacks
Correct article usage
the drawbacks
overweigh
Verb problem
outweigh
benefits
. I believe that both sides should be considered, and in Correct article usage
the benefits
this
essay, I explain in detail my point of view.
To start with, working remotely rocketed when the COVID-19 pandemic began, however
, nowadays its popularity has increased dramatically. This
is related to its main advantages given by saving time and money, thus
there is a reduction of
the stipends spent Change preposition
in
in
commuting, which could represent 20% or 30% of the total expenses, Change preposition
on
as well as
many hours should be traveled
since there are long distances. Change the spelling
travelled
For example
, in Bogota, the transportation system is called 'Transmilenio' that
Correct pronoun usage
which
cost
approximately 3.000 Wrong verb form
costs
colombian
pesos per person, and hundreds of people take more than one hour to arrive home Change the capitalization
Colombian
due to
the traffic condictions
.
Correct your spelling
conditions
In contrast
, some demerits should be enumerated where, perhaps, social skills and socialization are the most vital topics. Since societies have been created, humans have had a huge capacity of talking
and Change preposition
to talk
relating
to each other. Wrong verb form
relate
Nevertheless
, working from residential areas have
cut off these relationships leading to Correct subject-verb agreement
has
increase
Correct article usage
an increase
of
many psychiatric disorders. Change preposition
in
For instance
, in Japan, many mental issues such
as depression and anxiety have peaked due to
level
of stress with less personal interactions.
Fix the agreement mistake
levels
To sum up
, there are merits and downsides that should be taken in
account when remote work Change preposition
into
is being considering
. Change the verb form
is being considered
is considering
Therefore
, employees' opinion
should be evaluated Fix the agreement mistake
opinions
as well as
social conditions, then
alternatives Correct word choice
and then
have been
proposed Wrong verb form
should be
such
as hybrid programs.Submitted by luciaagudelomotta on
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Structure
Ensure your essay has a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Each paragraph should have a distinct main idea that is developed and elaborated upon.
Linking
Use a variety of linking words to connect ideas within and between paragraphs. This will help in creating a more coherent and cohesive essay.
Content
Try to provide more balance in discussing both sides of the argument. While you've presented both advantages and disadvantages, ensure each side is thoroughly explored to provide a more comprehensive view.
Examples
You have effectively used examples from real-life scenarios (e.g., Bogota's Transmilenio) to support your arguments, making your essay both relatable and persuasive.
Structure
Your essay shows a good structure with a clear introduction, body paragraphs discussing separate points, and a summative conclusion. This organization enhances readability and clarity.
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