In recent years, sports stars have become increasingly famous and wealthy. For some this is a benefit, raising the profit of sports, but for others, it is a negative influence. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

in
modren
Correct your spelling
modern
life
,
sport
Fix the agreement mistake
sports
show examples
have the opportunity to become more important in our
life
and the population
begin
Wrong verb form
has begun
show examples
to play
sports
in
deference
Correct your spelling
a different
show examples
era that
make
Wrong verb form
made
show examples
it more wealthy and famous, some people
calm
Verb problem
say
show examples
that
sports
have some cons ,
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
definitly
Correct your spelling
definitely
disagree with them in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
essay
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
will illustrate
the
Remove the article
apply
show examples
both standpoints .
to begin
with ,
sport
Fix the agreement mistake
sports
show examples
play
big
Add an article
a big
show examples
role
from
Change preposition
for
show examples
decades and the number of
player
Change to a plural noun
players
show examples
begin more increasing
in
Change preposition
over
show examples
time , the individual
begin
Correct subject-verb agreement
begins
show examples
understanding
Change the verb form
to understand
show examples
the benefits of
sport
and
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
exercise
make
Correct subject-verb agreement
makes
show examples
the
person
more active and
push
Correct subject-verb agreement
pushes
show examples
him
furthermore
to be strong and
make
Verb problem
build
show examples
muscle , for incense football need from the individual to be fast , focus and
also
activities with the
teem
Correct your spelling
team
show examples
all these things can build the
person
. in another hand , some people
clam
Correct your spelling
claim
show examples
that
sport
Fix the agreement mistake
sports
show examples
have some negative
feels
Replace the word
feelings
show examples
in
Change preposition
about
show examples
ourselves
Correct pronoun usage
us
show examples
they see
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
sports
just take from
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
personal time and
life
,
for example
person
Correct article usage
a person
show examples
Correct pronoun usage
who play
show examples
play
Correct subject-verb agreement
plays
show examples
basketball he will take
from
Change preposition
apply
show examples
his time to play and from his own house
this
can
make
Verb problem
cause
show examples
some problems with the family .
to sum up
,
sport
Fix the agreement mistake
sports
show examples
can change our
life
if the
person
now
Correct your spelling
knows
show examples
how when
play
Fix the infinitive
to play
show examples
and when
give
Wrong verb form
given
show examples
the opportunity to the family
sports
can be the
traditional
Replace the word
tradition
show examples
of the country and more than that
its
Correct pronoun usage
it
show examples
also
effects
Correct your spelling
affects
show examples
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
behaviour and
influence
Correct subject-verb agreement
influences
show examples
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
health .
Submitted by abdulelah.gh3 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Grammar & Spelling
It's important to ensure accuracy in spelling and grammar throughout your essay. This will help maintain the clarity of your argument and contribute to a more polished presentation.
Essay Structure
Try to introduce a clear structure in your essay that includes an introduction, body paragraphs each discussing a distinct viewpoint, and a conclusion. This structure helps in organizing your ideas and making your argument more compelling.
Content Development
To strengthen your essay, consider adding more concrete examples and detailed explanations to your points. This approach will provide stronger support for your arguments and make them more persuasive.
Cohesion
Enhance coherence by using linking words and phrases to connect your ideas more effectively. This makes your essay easier to follow and strengthens the flow of your arguments.
Task Response
Ensure you fully address the prompt by discussing both views presented and providing a clear personal opinion. This will fulfill the task's requirements more completely and enhance your response's relevance.
Balanced Argumentation
You have effectively explained your viewpoint and discussed both sides of the argument, which is a positive aspect of your essay.
Topic Relevance
You demonstrate an understanding of the topic and its relevancy in modern life, which adds value to your essay.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Ultimate Speaking practice for IELTS

Practice speaking step by step, answer real-life questions, and build your confidence. Start your free trial and improve your speaking skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays:

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!