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Writing Samples
Band 5

With a growing population many people believe that we should focus on producing more GM foods. What are the advantages and the disadvantages of doing this?

#population #people #focus #gm #foods
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In recent years, the human population has rapidly increased. Because of the growing population, individuals need more food. Some people argue that producing
GM
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meals
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 has some advantages.
However
Linking Words
, others think that there are a lot of disadvantages for the public. Producing
GM
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meals
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 helps nations to feed their citizens.
For example
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, in many countries population is rapidly growth and sometimes governments cannot produce enough
edibles
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 but if society focuses on producing
GM
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edibles
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, they can feed their citizen because
GM
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grub
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 can grow quickly.
However
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,
GM
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meals
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 have negative effects on people's lives.
Thus
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,
GM
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edibles
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 grow quickly and governments can feed their nation.
On the other hand
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,
GM
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meals
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 treat society's health.
For instance
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, people do not know what changes are made to
GM
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meals
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, if children eat
GM
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grub
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 in their growing ages, they might have some physical problems
such
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 as diabetes or health problems because
GM
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edibles
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 affect human DNA and
bodies's
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body
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 function. Unlike, if scientists display results of the
GM
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grub
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 on the human body, individuals can feel safe.
Therefore
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, a community cannot ignore drawbacks of the
GM
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 foodstuff.
To sum up
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, eating
GM
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 foodstuffs has both negative and positive effects.
It is clear that
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 a focus on producing
GM
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grub
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 has a crucial effect on human lives. If the governments concentrate on producing
GM
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meals
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, they will have to do more research because
it
Correct pronoun usage
there
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 can be more drawbacks than benefits of eating
GM
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edibles
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.
Submitted by atakantemizkan0 on

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coherence cohesion
Focus on refining the organization of your ide as throughout the essay to improve logical flow. Try using clearer transition phrases to guide the reader from one point to the next.
task achievement
Consider unpacking your arguments more thoroughly. While you've introduced key advantages and disadvantages, expanding on these with more detailed examples or explanations could strengthen your essay.
language use
Review the essay for minor grammatical errors and inconsistencies in terminology (e.g., 'GM meals', 'GM edibles', 'GM grub'). Consistent and accurate language use will enhance your essay's clarity and engagement.
introduction
Your introduction provides a good setup for the discussion, outlining the key issue and presenting both sides of the argument effectively.
conclusion
Your conclusion effectively sums up the argument, highlighting the necessity of careful consideration regarding the production of GM foods.
stance
You have a clear stance throughout the essay, which is good practice for making your argumentation persuasive and coherent.

Answer the 'Advantages and Disadvantages' topic

IELTS advantages and disadvantages questions normally give you a statement and ask you to comment on the advantages and disadvantages of that statement.

Answer structure for the type of essay

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – advantages
  • Body paragraph 2 – disadvantages
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • The main advantage is...
  • The disadvantage of this...
  • The main benefit...
  • Despite these advantages...
  • One possible drawback...

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