Ensuring that regular physical exercise should be the responsibility of parents and therefore schools should not waste valuable school time having sports lesson as part of the curriculum. To what extent do you agree?

#exercise #responsibility #parents #schools #waste #school #time #sports #lesson #part #curriculum

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Schools

Use synonyms

should give more importance

for

Change preposition

show examples

academics and not spend their

time

Use synonyms

on teaching sports

activities

Use synonyms

, and it is the responsibility of their parents to ensure that their

children

Use synonyms

are regularly involved in physical

activities

Use synonyms

. In

this

Linking Words

essay, I totally agree with

this

Linking Words

statement. The first reason why I believe that parents can teach sports

activities

Use synonyms

for

children

Use synonyms

and

schools

Use synonyms

should not focus on them is because there are a lot of portions to cover in their curriculum. Nowadays, competitions have increased

Change preposition

apply

show examples

a lot and

children

Use synonyms

are needed

Wrong verb form

need

show examples

to be trained to cope

Change preposition

apply

show examples

with the academic subjects demands. Many universities select their students based on their academic performance and the scores they got in their main subjects.

As a result

Linking Words

schools

Use synonyms

should give more

attentions

Fix the agreement mistake

attention

show examples

to academics than spending

time

Use synonyms

on playing

activities

Use synonyms

For instance

Linking Words

, teachers can utilise the physical training periods to teach maths formulas in

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

interesting or fun ways, which will help them to memorise them and perform well in their exams.

In addition

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

schools

Use synonyms

should inculcate

computer

Use synonyms

skills

Use synonyms

instead

Linking Words

of providing

time

Use synonyms

to play. These days,

computer

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knowlege

Correct your spelling

knowledge

is one of the important

skill

Fix the agreement mistake

skills

show examples

, which is useful for students to develop their

career

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careers

show examples

Children

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who

excell

Correct your spelling

excel

in technology can utilize their computers to prepare presentations and assertations using that. If they lack those

skills

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, they will struggle to complete their education with high scores because

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

most of their study work

need

Correct subject-verb agreement

needs

show examples

for

Change preposition

apply

show examples

the help of

computer

Use synonyms

knowledge.

For example

Linking Words

, in India, learners who are

expert

Fix the agreement mistake

experts

show examples

computer

Use synonyms

skills

Use synonyms

make

project

Fix the agreement mistake

projects

show examples

for Tech companies, which

help

Correct subject-verb agreement

helps

show examples

to establish their knowledge

Change preposition

show examples

their

Change the word

show examples

early age

itself

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

. In conclusion, I strongly believe that

school

Fix the agreement mistake

schools

show examples

should give a lot of

time

Use synonyms

in covering their academic subjects and to provide the

children

Use synonyms

with soft

skills

Use synonyms

to enhance their future careers.

Submitted by prasadjul1986 on Wed May 01 2024

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Task Response

Make sure to present both sides of the argument before concluding, as you have a strong stance. Representing opposing views, even briefly, can strengthen your argument.

Coherence and Cohesion

To enhance coherence, use a wider range of linking words and phrases to connect ideas more smoothly.

Language and Style

Consider integrating a wider variety of sentence structures to add complexity and interest to your writing.

Introduction and Conclusion

You provided a clear introduction and conclusion that aligned well with your argument, supporting your stance effectively.

Structure

Your essay is well-structured, making it easy for readers to follow your points.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

firstly
secondly
thirdly
in additional
moreover
also
for example
for instance
therefore
however
although
even though
despite

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6
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
6
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
20
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

304 words

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Ensuring that regular physical exercise should be the responsibility of parents and therefore schools should not waste valuable school time having sports lesson as part of the curriculum. To what extent do you agree?

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Some people say that the best way to improve public health is by increasing the number of sports facilities. Others,however,say other measures are required.

Some experts believe that it is better for children to begin learning a foreign language at primary school rather than secondary school, Do the advantages of this outweight disadvantages.

Some people think that it’s a good idea to socialise with work colleagues during evenings and weekends. Other people think it’s important to keep working life compeletly separate from social life. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Most people are not interested in how their food has been produced. They only care about how much it costs. How true is this statement? What influences people when they buy food? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Completing university education is thought by some to be the best way to get a good job. On the other hand, other people think that getting experience and developing soft skills is more important. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.