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Writing Samples /
Band 5.5

The graph shows the life expectancy of people living in Asian regions from 1950 and predicts life expectancy until 2300. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The graph shows the life expectancy of people living in Asian regions from 1950 and predicts life expectancy until 2300. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#life #expectancy #people #asian #regions #information #features #comparisons
The line graph provides
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
information about the people's expectancy of
life
 in the regions of
asia
Change the capitalization
Asia
show examples
 between two time periods (1950-2300).
overall
, Western
Asia
 is drastically increased followed by
china
Capitalize word
China
show examples
 and all the
others
Correct quantifier usage
other
show examples
 regions are likely to be similar with little variations. During the recorded period just over
the
Correct article usage
apply
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50
years
 of
life
 expectancy is recorded for western
asia
Change the capitalization
Asia
show examples
 and it has
rised suddely
Correct your spelling
risen suddenly
 to just under
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
80 in 2000 and
therefore
 it
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
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steadily reached
to
Change preposition
apply
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nearly 103
years
 in 2300, china stood
in
Change preposition
apply
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the second highest
life
expetency
Correct your spelling
expectancy
at the end
 of the recorded period with approximately 95
years
.
On the other hand
, India,
South eastern
Correct your spelling
Southeastern
show examples
Asia
, Other
south-centeral
Correct your spelling
south-central
asia
Change the capitalization
Asia
show examples
 and Other Eastern Asian regions
are having
Wrong verb form
have
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almost
Add an article
the almost
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same
Correct article usage
the same
show examples
 level of
life
 expectancy
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
 the
begining
Correct your spelling
beginning
 of the 1950s with around 40
years
 and in 2300 with 90
years
 approximately with some minor differences.
Submitted by eeretimaheshsritej on

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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Replace the words life, asia, years with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "approximately" was used 2 times.
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