Food travels thousands of miles from farmers to consumers. Some people think that it would be better for our environment and economy if people consumed locally produced foods. To what extent do the advantages of this would outweigh the disadvantages?

#food #thousands #miles #farmers #consumers #people #environment #economy #foods

In recent years,

progresses

Correct subject-verb agreement

progress

show examples

in transportation

have

Correct subject-verb agreement

has

show examples

diminished the impacts of physical barriers, which opens the accessibility to broader resources.

This

change

also

impacted

Change preposition

apply

show examples

food

travels

Fix the agreement mistake

travel

show examples

While

foods

are being transport

Change the verb form

are being transported

are transporting

show examples

Change preposition

apply

show examples

long distances, some argue that

this

change is

lack

Correct article usage

a lack

show examples

of environmental and

economical

Replace the word

economic

show examples

considerations. In my point of view, I agree with the negative impacts on our surroundings, but I

also

believe that it

posses

Wrong verb form

possesses

show examples

certain advantages. On one hand, advocates

argues

Change the verb form

argue

show examples

that consuming foods from local can reduce carbon footprint during

transport

Correct article usage

the transport

show examples

stage, adding

Change preposition

apply

show examples

the

Correct your spelling

that

show examples

freshness is strongly improved.

For example

, grocery shopping in the local markets is a practical way of discovering the most fresh ingredients, and

also

they are often produced by farmers in the area.

Also

, consuming domestic food

products

can help

reviving

Wrong verb form

revive

show examples

the local stores

who

Correct pronoun usage

that

show examples

might be struggling to survive.

However

, It is not practical to completely cut down on consuming foreign

products

. Mass production

allow

Change the verb form

allows

show examples

companies to lower costs, and friendly prices are one of the

determined

Replace the word

determining

show examples

factors in consumer

behavior

Change the spelling

behaviour

show examples

. Considering financial conditions, minorities in

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

society might not have extra budgets to support

environmental

Change the word

environmentally

show examples

friendly actions,

in contrast

, they might choose the cheapest one for only maintaining basic needs.

Moreover

, certain crops or ingredients are produced in certain areas, and they all

serves

Change the verb form

serve

show examples

different roles for our health. Intake

Change preposition

of a

show examples

broader range of

products

diversifies our diet and nutrition. In my opinion, both

practice

Change to a plural noun

practices

show examples

posses

Correct your spelling

possess

show examples

merits, and moderate practice should be implemented for

better

Add an article

the better

show examples

good.

Consume

Wrong verb form

Consuming

show examples

domestic foods can avoid discharging excessive greenhouse gases, and help

with

Change preposition

apply

show examples

control climate change. Yet,

encompass

Wrong verb form

encompassing

show examples

versatile

nutritions

Fix the agreement mistake

nutrition

show examples

in diet serves a crucial role in maintaining a comprehensive health condition. Intaking a proper proportion of imported

products

completes our health.

Submitted by lil40629890 on Thu May 02 2024

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Introduction clarity

Try to present your argument more clearly in the introduction to guide the reader through your essay.

Transitional phrases

Use a wider range of cohesive devices for coherence; transitions between paragraphs could be smoother.

Language variety

Incorporate more varied sentence structures and vocabulary to enhance your expression.

Answering the prompt

Consider directly addressing the question of whether the advantages outweigh the disadvantages in your conclusion.

Balanced Argument

Good job on presenting a balanced view on the topic with clear supports for both sides.

Use of Examples

Effective use of examples to support your points.

Essay Structure

The essay structure (introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion) is well organized.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
29Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

289 words

5.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

Carbon footprint
Local economies
Small-scale farmers
Indigenous crops
Fresher produce
Biodiversity
Global trade
Interdependence
Economic insularity
Transportation distance
Seasonal restrictions
Cultivation

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Food travels thousands of miles from farmers to consumers. Some people think that it would be better for our environment and economy if people consumed locally produced foods. To what extent do the advantages of this would outweigh the disadvantages?

Fully explain your ideas

In many countries, children are becoming overweight and unhealth. Some people think that the government has the responsibility to solve this problem. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

137. Learning in one’s native tongue yields better school scores than learning in a medium language. Do you agree or disagree? Argue your point of view.

Some people think that environmental problems should be solved on a global scale while others believe it is better to deal with them nationally. Discuss both sides and give your opinion

Being good at mathematics depends on a persons natural ability as well as quality of teaching they recieve . To what extent do you agree or disagree?