Eating too much sugar is harmful to health. Some people think it is the government’s responsibility to limit people’s sugar consumption, while others think it is an individual’s responsibility to limit the amount of sugar they eat. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Unhealthy
Correct article usage
An unhealthy
show examples
living style
Correct your spelling
lifestyle
show examples
is
major
Add an article
a major
show examples
problem for today's
people
. The onus is on
government
Add an article
the government
show examples
to control carbohydrate consumption among
people
and I am
insynchronization
Correct your spelling
in synchronization
with
people
believe
Correct pronoun usage
who believe
show examples
that
pupil
Fix the agreement mistake
pupils
show examples
should be aware
for
Change preposition
of
show examples
their health . In upcoming
paragraphs
Add a comma
paragraphs,
show examples
I am going to discuss both views. Discussing, why local authorities ought to
aware
Add a missing verb
be aware
show examples
people
for
side
Correct article usage
the side
show examples
efffects
Correct your spelling
effects
of high
level
Fix the agreement mistake
levels
show examples
of
suger
Correct your spelling
sugar
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
daily
Correct article usage
a daily
show examples
basis. They can start
Add an article
a campaign
the campaign
show examples
campaign
Fix the agreement mistake
campaigns
show examples
for citizens to educate them don't only about
right
Add an article
the right
show examples
amount of
suger
Correct your spelling
sugar
hunan
Correct your spelling
human
body
need
Change the verb form
needs
show examples
but
also
by suggesting some other natural
sweetner
Correct your spelling
sweetener
sweeteners
they can use to replace sugar from daily
life
.
Furthermore
, if
government
Correct article usage
the government
show examples
start advertising on social media
for reducing
Change preposition
to reduce
show examples
suger
Correct your spelling
sugar
consumption and
permoting
Correct your spelling
promote
healthy
Correct article usage
a healthy
show examples
lifestyle,
people
will
get
Verb problem
be
show examples
more
consciousness
Replace the word
conscious
show examples
about
Change preposition
of
show examples
unhealthy food.
Hence
they will neither
adapt
Correct your spelling
adopt
show examples
unhealthy
Correct article usage
an unhealthy
show examples
life
nor heavy consumption of
suger
Correct your spelling
sugar
.
On the other hand
, individuals need to be aware
for
Change preposition
of
show examples
their health.
People
have to
knowledgeable
Add a missing verb
be knowledgeable
show examples
for
Change preposition
about
show examples
good
Add an article
the good
show examples
life style
Correct your spelling
lifestyle
show examples
and they maintain their health either by doing daily exercise or
adapting
Correct your spelling
adopting
show examples
natural
suger
Correct your spelling
sugar
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
daily basis
life
.
Moerover
Correct your spelling
Moreover
,
Family
Correct article usage
the Family
show examples
should be responsible
to maintain
Change preposition
for maintaining
show examples
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
healthy diet chart for all family members, so observing the eating habits of all members at home. If someone
like
Change the verb form
likes
show examples
to eat more
Correct your spelling
sugar
suger
l, they might
to
Fix the infinitive
apply
show examples
encourage them to
dondiet
Correct your spelling
continue
to ignore artificial
suger
Correct your spelling
sugar
substances
Change preposition
on at
show examples
at
Correct your spelling
a
show examples
daily basis. In
conlusion
Correct your spelling
conclusion
,
although
loval
Correct your spelling
local
authorities can help mankind to decline
suger
Correct your spelling
sugar
use,
but
Remove the conjunction
apply
show examples
still the person can do much better for themselves and decrease
suger
Correct your spelling
sugar
use in
life
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
because they know their habits
batter
Correct your spelling
better
show examples
than others.
Submitted by kaurjagdeep2209 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Introduction
Ensure your introduction clearly presents the topic and your opinion. Briefly mention the points you will discuss.
Paragraph structure
Develop clear and distinct paragraphs, each focusing on a single main idea, to improve logical structure and coherence.
Linking words
Use a variety of linking words to connect ideas within and between paragraphs effectively, enhancing coherence.
Examples
Provide specific examples to support your arguments. This makes your essay more persuasive and engaging.
Conclusion
Ensure your conclusion summarizes the main points discussed and reiterates your opinion clearly.
Grammar and spelling
Review grammar and spelling to avoid errors that can distract from your message.
Engagement with task
You engage with the task by presenting both views and your opinion, showing an understanding of the topic.
Argument development
You attempt to provide examples and reasons behind opinions, which is good practice for developing arguments.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Ultimate Speaking practice for IELTS

Practice speaking step by step, answer real-life questions, and build your confidence. Start your free trial and improve your speaking skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • harmful
  • government intervention
  • policies and regulations
  • public health
  • individual responsibility
  • education and awareness campaigns
  • freedom of choice
  • balanced approach
  • food industry
  • sugar content
  • obesity
  • diabetes
  • health problems
  • taxation
  • advertising restrictions
  • labeling requirements
  • reading food labels
  • natural sweeteners
  • cooking at home
  • moderation
  • balanced diets
What to do next:
Look at other essays:

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!