1.Many companies sponsor sports as a way of advertising themselves. Some people think this is good for the world of sport, while others think it is negative. discus both views and give your opinion

Nowadays some
companies
prefer to sponsor
sports
to advertise their
brands
and many people believe
this
may be beneficial for the
sports
facilities;
on the other hand
, others think that drawbacks will be more than benefits. In my opinion, there are more positive sides to
this
kind of advertisement.
To begin
with,
sports
programmes have
a gain
Wrong verb form
gained
show examples
popularity with advanced technology and recently
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
most people have preferred to watch
sports
games on TV.
Moreover
, there are some famous competitions
for instance
the World Cup and Olympic games
also
this
can be a vital reason why many
brands
prefer to sponsor
sports
.
In addition
,
this
significant competition will be a fundamental marketing strategy for
companies
because they will reach a lot of customers in
this
way and get high profits.
However
, there can be some drawbacks to
this
strategy. Some business places want to sponsor sporters and
this
may cause some issues
for example
recently one of the famous
brands
decided to collab with a popular footballer and they
shooted
Correct your spelling
shot
show examples
an advertisement.
However
, lately,
this
sporter made a scandal situation about
him
Correct pronoun usage
his
show examples
personal
lives
Fix the agreement mistake
life
show examples
because of
this
reason
also
brand affected badly. So,
companies
should consider the quality of
sports
programmes and communities
otherwise
if they can look just popularity of
sports
, they will choose the wrong person. In conclusion, some people believe that collapses with
sports
and advertising can be beneficial for
brands
because of their reputation but drawbacks should be considered deeply to avoid negative situations. I believe
this
marketing strategy will
be
Verb problem
have
show examples
a positive impact on
companies
and
sports
clubs.
Submitted by muge2k on

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It's beneficial to offer more detailed explanations and examples to support your points. This can add depth to your essay and make your arguments more convincing.
coherence cohesion
To improve coherence, make sure your essay has clear topic sentences at the beginning of each paragraph that signal the main idea. This helps the reader to follow your argument more easily.
coherence cohesion
Check for and correct grammatical errors and improve sentence structure for better clarity and flow of information.
task achievement
You've done well in presenting both views on the subject, maintaining a balanced discussion throughout the essay.
task achievement
Your conclusion effectively summarises your opinion, showing good task achievement.
coherence cohesion
The organization of your essay shows a logical flow of ideas, which is commendable.

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    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Corporate sponsorships
  • vital funds
  • growth and development
  • over-commercialization
  • corporate interests
  • unequal opportunities
  • expertise in marketing
  • widely broadcasted
  • integrity of the sport
  • commercial considerations
  • visibility and engagement
  • physical fitness
  • community spirit
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