In some cultures the old age is more valued, while in other cultures youth is more valued. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
There is no denying the fact that both aged and youth are
essintial
for any country. Correct your spelling
essential
While
it is held belief that in some regions old people
are more important, there is also
an argument that young people
are more valued. this
essay will discuss both points of views
and I will express my opinion.
On Fix the agreement mistake
view
one
hand, aged Correct article usage
the one
people
have an extremly
crucial thing which is Correct your spelling
extremely
the
Correct article usage
apply
experince
. In Correct your spelling
experience
other word
, they have gone through Change the wording
another word
other words
a
Correct article usage
apply
diffrent
Correct your spelling
different
obstecles
and tests during their lives. Correct your spelling
obstacles
In addition
, in every country
there is a consultent Add a comma
country,
which his
job Correct pronoun usage
whose
to
Add a missing verb
is to
advice
the president Replace the word
advise
in
major topics. Change preposition
on
For example
, the president of Saudi Arabia has a consultant with 59 years old, and he is handleing
many sensitive topics Correct your spelling
handling
such
as the war with Yeman
.
Correct your spelling
Yemen
On the other hand
, young citizens are the backbone of any country. It is also
possible to say that without youth
Correct your spelling
young
people
, it can not evolve in any sector. Where the crativity
and imagination come from Correct your spelling
creativity
them
and they Correct pronoun usage
apply
full
of energy. Add a missing verb
are full
Furthermore
, some task
can not be done unless there are young Fix the agreement mistake
tasks
people
. For instance
, Correct article usage
the manifacture
manifacture
sector is one of the main sectors that Correct your spelling
manufacture
requier
young Correct your spelling
require
people
to do it.
In conclusion, there is
no easy answers to Change the verb form
are
this
topic. On balance, I tend to believe that both old and young citizens have their
important role in life. Without Change the word
an
ethier
of Correct your spelling
either
them
the scale of life will be destroyed. Add a comma
them,
While
we can learn from old people
, we can get help from young people
.Submitted by Aljawir3 on
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Grammar & Spelling
Be mindful of spelling and grammatical errors to enhance clarity. For example, 'essintial' should be 'essential', 'experince' should be 'experience', and 'obstecles' should be 'obstacles'. Correcting these will make your writing more polished.
Sentence Structure
Consider using a variety of sentence structures to make your essay more engaging. This includes complex sentences and variations in sentence beginnings.
Linking Words
To further strengthen your coherence and cohesion, you can use more linking words and phrases that explicitly show the relationship between ideas within and between paragraphs.
Task Response
You've given a balanced view of both perspectives before stating your own position, which is a good approach for this type of essay.
Essay Structure
The essay structure is clear with a distinct introduction, body paragraphs for each viewpoint, and a conclusion that restates your opinion effectively.
Use of Examples
You've used examples to support your points, such as the consultant to the president of Saudi Arabia, which helps ground your arguments in reality.