It is clear from the graph that the ratio of smoking men were the highest over the period given, while the women were the lowest in general.
The line chart illustrates the rates of smoking between
males
and females
in some land from 1960 to 2000.
It is noticeable that women have a lower rate
than men in all years. Furthermore
, the rate
of smoking by men has decreasing all the years.
In 1960, the number of smokers had different starting points, which was close to 100,000 for females
and 600,000 for males
. In addition
, the rate
of smoking in Someland fell to 500,000 males
inhabitants in 1975. Change the noun form
male
Moreover
, the value of smoking was highest dropped approximately to 295,000 males
during the period 1975 to 1995. Then
, the number of rate
smoking by
Change preposition
apply
males
slightly decreased to 250,000 males
in a half-decade.
In terms of the rate
of smoking in some land by women, the amount of smoking rate
rose to 310,000 females
population from 1960 to 1975 and the smoking rate
was constant at 310,000 females
from 1975 to 1980 but the amount slightly decreased to 300,000 females
in 1985. After that, the number of females
rates declined year by year, which was approximately 290,000, 210,000, and 200,000 females
in 1990,1995, and 2000, respectively.Submitted by ru.kabiru.biru on
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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Basic structure: Change the second paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words males, females, rate with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "decreased" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "approximately" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "slightly" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+
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