IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 2

Improvements in health, education and trend are essential for the development of poorer nations. However, the governments of richer nations should take more responsibilities for helping the poorer nations in such areas. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

#improvements #health #education #trend #development #nations #governments #responsibilities #areas
it is argued that
devoloped
Correct your spelling
developed
 in health , education and
trend
Fix the agreement mistake
trends
show examples
Correct your spelling
are
show examples
ara
Correct your spelling
are
show examples
 basics for
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
poor
Correct your spelling
countries
counries
Correct your spelling
countries
,
Correct your spelling
nevertheless
neverthless
Correct your spelling
nevertheless
, the
Correct your spelling
governments
goverments
Correct your spelling
governments
 of
fist
Correct your spelling
First
show examples
nation
Fix the agreement mistake
Nations
show examples
 should take
Correct your spelling
responsibility
responsibilities
responsipilites
Correct your spelling
responsibility
 for helping the poor one , I disagree with
this
 statement ,
due to
 the the
corupution
Correct your spelling
corruption
 of poor countries , first of all , it is known whatever money they will have, the
satuation
Correct your spelling
situation
 never
change
Correct subject-verb agreement
changes
show examples
 because they are corrupt
people
 , they do not care about
thier
Correct your spelling
their
people
 and the
countey
Correct your spelling
country
it self
Correct your spelling
itself
show examples
moreover
 all
money
Correct article usage
the money
show examples
 they will have
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
will be for them and
there
Correct your spelling
their
show examples
 children. second of all , there
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
people
think
Correct pronoun usage
who think
show examples
 if the rich
counrues
Correct your spelling
countries
 the
people
Change noun form
people's
show examples
 life will change and they will be happy
people
 and
better
Add an article
a better
show examples
 life for them and I think if something
change
Change the verb form
changes
show examples
 I will be with them . in conculation, there
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
a
Correct determiner usage
some
show examples
people
think
Correct pronoun usage
who think
show examples
 there is no point
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
 giving to the poor country
helo
Correct your spelling
help
show examples
 and there
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
people
think
Correct pronoun usage
who think
show examples
 it
better
Add a missing verb
is better
show examples
 to
helo
Correct your spelling
help
show examples
 them .
Submitted by sama.abl24 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
To better support your main points, provide specific examples and evidence. This will make your arguments more persuasive.
coherence cohesion
Make sure your essay has a clear introduction, body, and conclusion. Each paragraph should have a clear main idea and supporting details.
task achievement
Consider exploring both sides of the argument more fully to fully address the essay prompt.
coherence cohesion
Pay attention to spelling and grammar to ensure your ideas are expressed clearly and accurately.
task achievement
You have presented a clear stance on the essay topic.
task achievement
Your essay topic is relevant and reflects an understanding of the issue.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: