the pie graph below show the result of a survey of chlidern's activities . the first graph shows the cultural and lesiure activities that boys participate in , where the second graph shows the activities in which the girls participate

#show #survey #chlidern #activities #first #lesiure #boys #second #girls

The pie

chart

shows the differences between

boys

and

girls

their

Change preposition

in their

show examples

culture and leisure

activities

Overall

pies

Correct article usage

the pies

show examples

chart

were in the same level of percentage , as we compared

between

Change preposition

apply

show examples

girls

and

boys

are the highest on computer games.

Likewise

girls

are the best

Change preposition

show examples

dancing . As can be seen more information in the pies

chart

, the first

chart

illustrates

boys

activities

there were prefer playing computer games

Change preposition

show examples

34% even though they playing basketball at 26% , In spite of

boys

did

Verb problem

apply

show examples

not

read

Wrong verb form

reading

show examples

any books , the percentage was 2% of reading . The second

chart

girls'

Add a missing verb

is girls'

show examples

cultural and leisure

activities

. They were more like dancing than reading . in the same way ,

girls

did a lot of

activities

unlike

Add the comma(s)

, unlike

show examples

boys

Change preposition

For

show examples

more information ,

girls

were listening to music and netball at 10 or 15

percentages

Replace the word

per cent

show examples

Submitted by nahlaalrashidi on Mon May 06 2024

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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.

Vocabulary: Replace the words chart, boys, girls, activities with synonyms.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 5 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "information" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 3 times.

▼

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2Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
11Grammar mistakes
 

3 paragraphs

149 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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the pie graph below show the result of a survey of chlidern's activities . the first graph shows the cultural and lesiure activities that boys participate in , where the second graph shows the activities in which the girls participate

In many countries, smoking is now illegal in public places. Many people believe that such a ban is justified. Do you agree or disagree?

In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this?

Some people think that children should be raised by all the family members (eg: uncle, aunt and grandparents) rather than only parents. Give your opinion.

Many people believe that media coverage of celebrities is having a negative effect on children. To what extent do you agree? You should write at least 250 words.

We are becoming increasingly dependent on computer-based technology. How do you think it will change in the future? Is it good for us to rely so much on computers?