The charts below show the main reasons for study among students of different age groups and the amount of support they received from employers. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

#show #study #students #age #groups #amount #support #employers #summarise #information #features #comparisons

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According to

Linking Words

the data, it can be demonstrated in two different charts. So,

to begin

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with, the first diagram, there are two categories of students with a range of ages starting from 26

till

Change preposition

show examples

49 years old, who prefer to receive higher education for career reasons and the second one just for personal interest.

Then

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, the information about

Correct article usage

the

show examples

proportion of the employer’s assistance to the different types of groups is illustrated.

Firstly

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, it is essential to analyze that individuals are more motivated to receive higher education for career purposes in the

young

Correct word choice

younger

show examples

period of life, it is almost 80 per cent.

However

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, after

being

Verb problem

getting

show examples

older, humans changed their trend and preferred to improve their skills for personal reasons and in accordance with the first chart, demonstrated the most growth at the age close to 49, around 70 per cent of people.

Nevertheless

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, the employer attempts to hire all of the groups of society, it can be investigated that more preferable for hiring people is getting the younger generation in the period of age under 26,

Overall

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, in order to summarize the whole information, it is seen that the most productive and effective age for a career can be accurately given to the young period under 26 years.

Submitted by akhmedova.mb on Tue May 07 2024

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Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.

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Vocabulary: The word "charts" was used 2 times.

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Vocabulary: The word "information" was used 2 times.

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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.

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7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

208 words

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The charts below show the main reasons for study among students of different age groups and the amount of support they received from employers. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

In many countries around the world , rural people are moving to cities ,so the population in the country side is decreasing Do you think it is a positive or a negative development

In a public-funded health care system people who are willing to pay for the best and fastest treatment should be able to do so. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge and experience.

Some parents believe that their children should do extra-curricular activities after school. Others say in this way children are under pressure. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Large companies should pay higher salaries to CEOs and executives, compared to other workers. To what extent do you agree or disagree ?

Nowadays more and more people have access to the Internet. But constant availability of any information worsens people's memory and critical thinking skills. To what extent do you agree or disagree?