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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Review the book "In Valeria's shoes" by Elisabeth Benavent.

#review #book #valeria #shoes #elisabeth #benavent
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Valeria's
shoes
Capitalize word
Shoes
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 is the first novel of Elisabet Benavent. Valeria is the main character of
this
book
. She has three inseparable friends, Irene, Maria and Laura. The
book
 describes how the four of them try to find love
while
 they are trying to
grown
Change the verb
grow
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 in their profession in the
competitve
Correct your spelling
competitive
 market in Madrid. The main plot is about Valeria. She is a married young woman
that
Correct pronoun usage
who
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 wants to become a writer.
However
, she is not happy in the marriage and she meets Sergio, a sexy
arquitec
Correct your spelling
architect
 that will make her turn her life upside down. Elisabet has been able to tell us a fun
story
 to which we can all young
girl
Fix the agreement mistake
girls
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 relate
to
Change preposition
apply
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. It is fresh, funny and entertaining. Some of my classmates have read the
book
 but contrary to my opinion, they
didnt
Correct your spelling
didn't
 like the
story
. They found the
book
 predictable and boring.
In addition
, they think that the
story
 is a copy of the
well known
Add a hyphen
well-known
show examples
 TV series,Sex in the
city
Capitalize word
City
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. In
this
book
also
 there are multiple sex
scene
Fix the agreement mistake
scenes
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 of the character and all
women
Correct article usage
the women
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would
Verb problem
apply
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discuss
they
Correct pronoun usage
their
show examples
 experiences
between
Change preposition
with
show examples
 them. In conclusion, despite the
rememberance
Correct your spelling
remembrance
to
Change preposition
of
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 the New York series, I think that Elisa=bet has managed to create a vivid and natural
story
.
Thus
,
this
 is not aiming to be a literature masterpiece. The intention of the author is to write a
book
 that you can read anytime even when you
dont
Correct your spelling
don't
 have the
energies
Fix the agreement mistake
energy
show examples
 to think too much.
Submitted by olatzbaroja on

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sentence structure
Try to vary your sentence structures more to enhance readability and interest. Incorporate a mix of simple, compound, and complex sentences.
depth analysis
Consider expanding on how the book's themes or characters might resonate with its audience, providing a deeper analysis rather than just summarizing the plot. This can enrich your review.
balance argument
While introducing the opposing viewpoint from your classmates adds depth to your review, ensure to balance it with more detailed reasoning behind your own viewpoint to make your argument more compelling.
spelling syntax
Keep an eye on minor spelling or syntax errors such as 'arquitec' should be 'architect', 'rememberance' should be 'resemblance', and 'Elisa=bet' likely intended as 'Elisabet'. These small errors can slightly distract the reader, but their impact on your overall argument is minimal.
introduction
You effectively introduced the book, its main characters, and main plot, which laid a good foundation for your review.
conclusion
Your conclusion succinctly wraps up your viewpoint, providing a clear final assessment of the book.
viewpoints
The personal and contrasting viewpoints add a nice depth to the essay, making it more engaging and comprehensive.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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