Information technology enables many people to do their work outside their workplace. Do the benefits of this mobility outweight the disadvantages?

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Due to
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the proliferation of technology,
people
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can proactively choose to finish their tasks outside rather than at the company.
Although
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it is understandable why some do not advocate remote working, I believe
this
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working method is more beneficial. Some opponents contend that working outside the company might bring some setbacks to office workers.
Firstly
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, these
people
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may experience a sense of isolation from colleagues and disconnect from their partners in other departments at the company. In the long run, the deficiency in face-to-face interaction might render them feel lonely, negatively impacting their emotional health, which leads to depression and anger for no reason.
In addition
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, individuals preferring to work from home or in a coffee shop possibly face unexpected and annoying distractions and noises,
such
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as sounds from other family members or babies crying.
Consequently
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, workers’ workflow can be interrupted, decreasing their productivity and concentration ability. Despite the above drawbacks, I still assert working online may offer office workers huge benefits. The first idea worth mentioning is that
this
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form can give them more room for innovation. Individuals working in the IT area or creative fields, like designers or copywriters, proactively opt for comfortable and relaxed work conditions to boost their creativity and performance.
For example
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, they might travel to a beach or a forest to enjoy magnificent natural scenery
while
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taking on their work responsibilities.
Furthermore
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, teleworking helps them reduce commuting time and travel expenses, meaning they can save money and have more time to care for their families. Particularly,
people
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with flexible working time have more free hours to share house chores with their families or help their partners pick up children, leading to a happy family and well-being. In summary, telecommuting has some detrimental effects on
people
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to a certain extent.
Nevertheless
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, based on the aforementioned arguments, I concur that the positive sides of
this
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working style are superior to the downsides.
Submitted by Mads on

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task achievement
Try to provide more specific examples in your arguments to strengthen the impact of your points.
coherence cohesion
Linking words and cohesive devices are well used, but utilizing a wider range of these can further improve the essay's flow.
coherence cohesion
The essay is well-structured with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion.
task achievement
You have provided a thorough examination of both views which helps in fully responding to the task.
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