Nowadays, there are a large number of coffee shops and fast-food vendors on high streets and in town centres. Why are there so many of these outlets? What effect is this having on the society?

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In
this
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modern era, the popularity of unhealthy
food
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is skyrocketing per day. There are numerous hawkers selling
Use synonyms
fast-
Correct your spelling
fast food
show examples
food
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as well as
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a
lot
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large
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number
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of coffee shops
in
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on
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every corner of
city
Add an article
the city
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including high streets and
central
Correct article usage
the central
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part of town.
Therefore
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, the reason behind the increased
number
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of these outlets and its effect on the community are listed below in the upcoming paragraphs.
Firstly
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, discussing the major reasons
of risement
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for the rise
show examples
in these types of outlets, the first and foremost is that, youngsters of
new
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the new
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generation love to eat and drink
junk
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food
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and beverages.
For instance
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,
fast-foods
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fast foods
show examples
such
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as
burger
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burgers
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,
pizza
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pizzas
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, french fries and many more dishes are
extraordinary
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extraordinarily
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delicious and
appetilising
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appetising
appetizing
, so young people can't control themselves from consuming
it
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them
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.
Apart from
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this
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, opening stalls of
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fast-
Correct your spelling
fast food
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food
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and cold drinks creates employment opportunities who make mouth-watering
food
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. To give
an examples
Correct the article-noun agreement
an example
examples
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, a certain person who has excellent talent in cooking
food
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had
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
opened their
food
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stall a couple of years ago and nowadays their dishes are famous worldwide and because of
it
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it,
show examples
they are
sre
Correct your spelling
sure
earning a lot sum of money.
However
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,
this
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trend
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
a negative impact on
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society. It is true that
junk
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food
Use synonyms
is liked by many folk, but it is
also
Linking Words
undeniable
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an undeniable
the undeniable
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fact that consuming
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fast-
Correct your spelling
fast food
show examples
food
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makes
body
Correct article usage
the body
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unhealthy and an easy catch for diseases and
virus
Fix the agreement mistake
viruses
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. For elaboration,
junk
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food
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contains
high
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a high
the high
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number
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of calories and carbohydrates with no proteins and vitamins.
Due to
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the absence of these minerals, a majority of individuals who eat unhealthy
food
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catch
Verb problem
become
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ill and problems
such
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as
obsesity
Correct your spelling
obesity
arises
Correct subject-verb agreement
arise
show examples
.
Hence
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,
this
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is a major drawback of
this
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latest trend. All in all, it is really true that
due to
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the the increase in shops selling
Use synonyms
fast-
Correct your spelling
fast food
show examples
food
Use synonyms
and coal drinks employment opportunity rises, in
consequences
Fix the agreement mistake
consequence
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a large
number
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of people are becoming unhealthy
due to
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the consumption of fast
food
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, so the youngsters must limit
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
eating
junk
Use synonyms
food
Use synonyms
to stay healthy.

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coherence cohesion
Try to organize your ideas more logically, ensuring a clear progression from one paragraph to the next. Use cohesive devices effectively to link your ideas.
lexical resource
Use a wider range of vocabulary to express your ideas more precisely and avoid repetition. This also helps to make your argument more compelling.
grammatical range accuracy
Check your essay for any grammatical errors and work on varying your sentence structures to enhance readability and clarity.
task response
Provide more specific examples to substantiate your arguments. This helps to make your essay more persuasive and grounded.
task response
You effectively addressed both parts of the prompt, discussing the reasons for the proliferation of fast-food outlets and coffee shops as well as their impact on society.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion are clear, providing a good frame for your essay.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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