Students should pay the full cost for their own study, because university education benefits individuals rather than society, To what extent do you agree or disagree?
The majority of people believe that pupils should
study
by
financial aid Change preposition
with
instead
of using their money
for the full cost although
university
education is not taken Correct article usage
a university
advantages
Fix the agreement mistake
advantage
for
society as huge as for individuals. Change preposition
of for
This
writer absolutely disagrees with that argument and will explain the reason for her view.
Nowadays, with
paying the full cost Change preposition
apply
for
Change preposition
of
study
process by yourself is advantageous for Correct article usage
the study
students
. It can be seen that the amount of money
spending
Replace the word
spent
for
education would be Change preposition
on
values
if Wrong verb form
valued
their
made an attempt Correct pronoun usage
they
doing
hard Change the verb form
to do
works
, Fix the agreement mistake
work
also
their
can make Replace the word
there
motivation
for them to try hard and pay attention Add an article
the motivation
on
learning. Change preposition
to
Additionally
, it also
has more the
opportunities for Correct article usage
apply
students
’ dependence, which enhance
the ability to manage time and learn how to balance between the job and Correct subject-verb agreement
enhances
works
of Fix the agreement mistake
work
study
. As Correct article usage
a
the
Correct article usage
a
Fix the agreement mistake
result
results
, Fix the agreement mistake
result
students
can be free Change the verb form
to develop
developed
themselves and express Verb problem
to develop
Correct pronoun usage
themselves
oneself
, which Correct pronoun usage
themselves
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
is
the Correct subject-verb agreement
are
Fix the agreement mistake
element
elements
for Fix the agreement mistake
element
Correct subject-verb agreement
influences
influence
Correct subject-verb agreement
influences
Change preposition
apply
to
the process of human Change preposition
apply
Replace the word
growth
grown
.
Replace the word
growth
However
, there are more beneficial for students
to have assistance from society than paying cost
from Fix the agreement mistake
costs
individual
. Fix the agreement mistake
individuals
This
is because students
should focus on the education universities instead
of working hard to get money
, also
if they wanted to response
Replace the word
respond
all
the price of Change preposition
to all
study
, it would pay a fortune. Furthermore
, the
mental and Correct article usage
apply
physic
will be affected Replace the word
physical
to
their lead to hinder the Change preposition
by
developed
Replace the word
development
grown
, so you will be exhausted and dominate the Verb problem
of growth
study
process. Scholarships are helping
mental Wrong verb form
help
students
aspect, it will proving
motivation, Verb problem
provide
feel
Fix the infinitive
to feel
relax
when not heavily Wrong verb form
relaxed
about
Correct word choice
concerned about
money
. After graduation, you can pay back for the government and go on your work.
In conclusion, this
argument also
has a correct and incorrect part, but I still disagree with this
situation.Submitted by [email protected] on
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Coherence & Cohesion
Your essay demonstrates a clear stance on the topic, but it's important to develop your arguments more comprehensively with specific examples and detailed reasoning to enhance clarity and impact.
Coherence & Cohesion
Work on varying your sentence structures to improve the logical flow of ideas. This will make your essay more engaging and easier to follow for the reader.
Task Achievement
To fully meet the task's requirements, ensure that your essay addresses all parts of the prompt. This includes examining both the merits and limitations of your view more thoroughly.
Task Achievement
Including specific, real-world examples can strengthen your argument, making it more convincing and relatable to the reader.
Task Achievement
You've taken a clear stance on the topic, which is essential for this type of essay.
Coherence & Cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion are present, providing a basic framework for your argument.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.