The government should be responsible for providing retirees with financial support and care. While many people think that citizens should save money to take care of themselves when they are old. Discuss both views and give your opinion

While

Linking Words

some people believe that the

government

Use synonyms

should be responsible for providing

retirees

Use synonyms

with financial

support

Use synonyms

and

care

Use synonyms

, others argue that

citizens

Use synonyms

should save

money

Use synonyms

to take

care

Use synonyms

of themselves when they are old. Both

point

Fix the agreement mistake

points

show examples

of

views

Fix the agreement mistake

view

show examples

and

Add an article

the reason

show examples

reason

Fix the agreement mistake

reasons

show examples

why I agree

the

Change preposition

with the

show examples

former statement will be elaborated on in

this

Linking Words

essay.

To begin

Linking Words

with, it may seem sensible for some to believe that the

government

Use synonyms

should provide monetary

support

Use synonyms

and

care

Use synonyms

for the elderly who have left

from

Change preposition

apply

show examples

the labour world.

This

Linking Words

is possibly because

retirees

Use synonyms

should get those

benefit

Fix the agreement mistake

benefits

show examples

in return

of

Change preposition

for

show examples

their

hardworking

Correct word choice

hard work

show examples

as they already paid

for

Change preposition

apply

show examples

the taxes and play a vital role

of

Change preposition

in

show examples

country's

Correct article usage

the country's

show examples

economics

Replace the word

economy

show examples

.

For example

Linking Words

, in Europe, there are various policies that

support

Use synonyms

the retired elderly in several

aspect

Change the noun form

aspects

show examples

such

Linking Words

as medical

care

Use synonyms

, transportation, and financial

aids

Fix the agreement mistake

aid

show examples

. The

opponent

Fix the agreement mistake

opponents

show examples

of

this

Linking Words

idea might not

satisfy

Wrong verb form

be satisfied

show examples

as they

view

Verb problem

believe

show examples

that

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

citizens

Use synonyms

should

have

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

plan and manage their

money

Use synonyms

in advance in order to prepare for the

retire

Replace the word

retirement

show examples

era. In

this

Linking Words

respect, it

can

Verb problem

is

show examples

understandable that the cost of living after retirement should not be from the

government

Use synonyms

funding as it can cost the country's debt. To illustrate, in order to provide services,

care

Use synonyms

, and facilities aiding the

retirees

Use synonyms

require

Correct subject-verb agreement

requires

show examples

money

Use synonyms

. The country alone already

have

Change the verb form

has

show examples

a huge amount of expenses so

that

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

the family or the

retirees

Use synonyms

themselve

Correct your spelling

themselves

should manage their own

life

Fix the agreement mistake

lives

show examples

instead

Linking Words

.

However

Linking Words

, I personally argue in favour of the

government

Use synonyms

as the sponsor seeing that

they

Add a verb

they are

they were

show examples

responsible for taking

care

Use synonyms

of its

peoples

Fix the agreement mistake

people

show examples

. Despite the fact that people must take

care

Use synonyms

of their own

life

Fix the agreement mistake

lives

show examples

, lack of

government

Use synonyms

support

Use synonyms

can imply

as

Change preposition

apply

show examples

negligence of its

citizens

Use synonyms

.

To simply

Change preposition

Simply

show examples

explain,

by

Change preposition

apply

show examples

not providing

aids

Fix the agreement mistake

aid

show examples

with

Change preposition

to

show examples

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

retirees

Use synonyms

which

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

many of

them

Correct pronoun usage

whom

show examples

are elderly at home can leave more burden

to

Change preposition

on

show examples

the family especially

the

Change preposition

with the

show examples

rise

of

Change preposition

in

show examples

expense

Fix the agreement mistake

expenses

show examples

. Take Thailand,

for example

Linking Words

: there are not many

policy

Change to a plural noun

policies

show examples

to

support

Use synonyms

the retiree as some

benefit

Fix the agreement mistake

benefits

show examples

offered by the

government

Use synonyms

were

Wrong verb form

are

show examples

limited

people

Change preposition

to people

show examples

. In conclusion,

although

Linking Words

it is undeniable that

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

citizens

Use synonyms

should

saved

Change the verb form

save

be saved

show examples

their

money

Use synonyms

for retirement, the

government

Use synonyms

should

support

Use synonyms

their

retirees

Use synonyms

financially and

care

Use synonyms

support

Use synonyms

in order to relieve the burden

of

Change preposition

on

show examples

the family

as well as

Linking Words

to

shows

Wrong verb form

show

show examples

gratitudes

Fix the agreement mistake

gratitude

show examples

for

Change preposition

to

show examples

those who have worked so hard for the

coutry's

Correct your spelling

country's

economic growth.