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Band 6.5

Some people believe that unpaid community service should be a compulsory part of high school programmes (for example working for a charity, improving the neighbourhood or teaching sports to younger children.) To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #community #service #part #school #programmes #charity #neighbourhood #sports #children
It has been suggested that high school
students
 should be involved in unpaid community services as a compulsory part of high school programmes. Most of the colleges are already providing opportunities to gain
work
 experience,
however
Add a comma
however,
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 these are not compulsory. In my opinion, sending
students
 to
work
 in community services is a good idea as it can provide them with lots of valuable
skills
. Life
skills
 are very important
and
Correct word choice
apply
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by
Change preposition
as
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 doing voluntary
work
.
Students
 can learn how to communicate with others and
work
 in a team but
also
 how to manage their time and improve their organisational
skills
. Nowadays, unfortunately, teenagers do not have many after-school activities. After-school clubs are no longer that popular and
students
 mostly go home and sit in front of the TV, browse
internet
Add an article
the internet
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 or play video games. By having compulsory
work
 activities with charitable or community organisations, they will be encouraged to do something more creative.
Skills
 gained through compulsory
work
 will not only be an asset on their CV but
also
 increase their employability.
Students
 will
also
 gain more respect towards
work
 and money as they will realise that it is not that easy to earn them and hopefully will learn to spend them in a more practical way. Healthy life balance and exercise are strongly promoted by the NHS, and
therefore
 any kind of spare time charity
work
 will prevent them from sitting and doing nothing. It could
also
 possibly reduce the Crime level in the high school age group. If
students
 have activities to do, they will not be bored and come up with silly ideas which can be dangerous for them or their surroundings. In conclusion, I think
this
 is a very good idea, and I hope
this
 programme will be put into action for high schools and colleges shortly.
Submitted by wanghongyu1 on

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    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • compulsory
  • high school programmes
  • unpaid community service
  • charity
  • improving the neighbourhood
  • teaching sports
  • sense of responsibility
  • empathy
  • broader perspective
  • societal issues
  • college applications
  • job applications
  • positive impact
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