IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

write a referral letter to an orthopedic surgeon

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I am writing to refer Mr. Taylor, a
38 -years-old
Correct your spelling
38-year-old

The words 38 -years-old seem to be misspelled. Consider replacing them.

gardener, who has been suffering from chronic left
knee
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.
pain
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

.
According to
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 new MRI findings that
shows
Correct subject-verb agreement
show

It seems that the verb shows does not agree with the subject. Consider changing the verb form.

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 damaged meniscal cartilage, he requires your urgent evaluation for any need
to
Change preposition
for

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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 meniscal repairment.
Mr.
Change the punctuation
Mr

The abbreviated title Mr. seems to be punctuated incorrectly. Consider changing the punctuation.

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 Taylor’s problem has been started since 9 months back after twisting
the
Change the word
his

The word the may be incorrect in this context. Consider changing it.

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knee
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

 in a tennis game. At
first
Add a comma
first,

It appears that you are missing a comma after the introductory phrase At first. Consider adding a comma.

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 the
pain
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

 was manageable with some
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

pain killers
Correct your spelling
painkillers

The word pain killers seems to be miswritten. Consider replacing it.

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. He came 6 months after the injury
on
Change preposition
in

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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 August, with left
knee
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.
pain
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

 and local tenderness on
medial
Add an article
the medial

The noun phrase medial joint line seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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 joint line. The
X ray
Add a hyphen
X-ray

It seems that X ray is missing a hyphen. Consider adding the hyphen(s).

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 was normal and he was requested to take NSAID and advised to get
review
Add an article
a review
the review

The noun phrase review seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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 in the clinic if there is no improvement. After 3 months he came again today
while
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 he was limping. He still had
a
Remove the article
apply

The indefinite article, a, may be redundant when used with the uncountable noun pain in your sentence. Consider removing it.

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pain
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

 and swelling in his left
knee
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

. He
concerns
Wrong verb form
is concerned

It appears that your sentence or clause uses an incorrect form of the verb concerns. Consider changing it.

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 the injury is inhibiting his productive work and he worried about that. Related to
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 chronic resistant
pain
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

 in
left
Correct article usage
the left

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

show examples
knee
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

 MRI was done. The report showed us a damaged meniscal cartilage. I would appreciate it if you could visit Mr. Taylor for any surgical
repairment
Replace the word
repair

The word repairment doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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 and removal of
damaged
Add an article
the damaged

The noun phrase damaged meniscus seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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 meniscus. Yours sincerely, Doctor,

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Greeting and Closing
Make sure to include a proper greeting and closing to add a formal touch to your referral letters.
Logical Structure
For a clearer structure, explicitly divide your letter into paragraphs, each with a unique purpose (e.g., introduction, patient history, request for evaluation).
Complete Response
Ensure concise and relevant details are included, focusing on information crucial for the referral. Avoid unnecessary medical histories or personal details unless directly relevant to the case.
Writing Tone
Use a formal and professional tone throughout the letter. Avoid using colloquial language or overly casual expressions.
Task Achievement
The letter provides a clear history of the patient's condition and succinctly explains the need for referral, demonstrating a good understanding of task requirements.
Coherence
Progression of ideas from the patient's initial injury to their current condition shows a coherent approach to presenting information.

The Greeting

Depending on the style and aim of the letter, you will need to adapt your greeting.

Always start an informal letter in the ways:

  • Dear + name
  • Hi / Hello + name

‘Dear...’ is more appropriate, so stick with this.

For a formal letter there are two options for the greeting:

  • Use Dear Sir or Madam if you don’t know the name of the person you are writing to.
  • Use Dear + surname if you do know their name, e.g. Dear Mr Smith or Dear Mrs Jones.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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