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some people believe that unpaid community services should be a compulsory part of High School programs( for example working for charity improving the neighborhood for teaching sports to younger children) To what extent do you agree or disagree

#people #community #services #part #school #programs #charity #neighborhood #sports #children
According to
 some, during high
school
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school,
show examples
 students should be encouraged to do unpaid
work
 for the welfare of
community
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the community
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. I firmly believe that it should be mandatory for every student to
work
 in
coodination
Correct your spelling
coordination
 with respective
programms
Correct your spelling
programmes
programs
 for community service.
To begin
 with, school is the place where a student
learn
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learns
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 different values and basic knowledge so, our schools should include both curricular and co-curricular activities
such
 as participating in charity
programms
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programmes
programs
, teaching sports to younger children and working in old care homes.
For example
, planting a tree to make
environment
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the environment
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 green and
pollution free
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pollution-free
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 is a motive
that is
 initiated by many countries and most
of
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apply
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it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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students and
yourth
Correct your spelling
youth
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
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 participating in it with
this
 the benefits are that children should know
importance
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the importance
show examples
to keep
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of keeping
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 surroundings neat and clean.
Furthermore
, groups of students should be allocated different social activities that should be unpaid because
this
 will incur a sense of responsibility in them that community service is
there
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their
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 responsibility.
To sum up
, it is very important for our youth to
work
fot
Correct your spelling
for
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 good cause because they are the ones who are the asset of the country so they should be involved in productive
work
.
Submitted by sananayyab91 on

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task response
Your essay shows a clear position throughout, which is excellent. Try to develop your ideas more comprehensively with more detailed examples to strengthen your arguments.
coherence & cohesion
Work on varying your sentence structures and using a wider range of linking words to improve the flow of your essay.
structure
The introduction and conclusion are well-defined, clearly stating your position.
coherence & cohesion
The essay is well-organized, with a logical flow that makes it easy to follow.
task response
You've used relevant examples to support your main points, which strengthens your task response.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • fosters
  • compassion
  • empathy
  • civic engagement
  • practical skills
  • real-world experiences
  • invaluable
  • burden
  • impinging
  • logistical challenges
  • suitable placements
  • quality assurance
  • promote engagement
  • enthusiasm
  • meaningful
  • impactful
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