A growing number of people feel that animals should not be exploited by people and that they should have the same rights as humans, while others argue that humans must employ animals to satisfy their various needs, including uses for research. Discuss both views and give your opinion
In spite of
the
technological advancement, more and more people Correct article usage
apply
accepted
Wrong verb form
accept
to
Change preposition
apply
the
animal rights, Correct article usage
apply
whereas
the other Linking Words
belive
that Correct your spelling
believe
animals
are the main resources for Use synonyms
human
to aim Add an article
a human
the human
their
target, Change preposition
for their
such
as doing research. Linking Words
This
essay firmly agrees that it is beneficial for Linking Words
human
to preserve and give Fix the agreement mistake
humans
animal
a Fix the agreement mistake
animals
right
on account Use synonyms
to
the ecosystematic balance and the new way of solving environmental problems, despite those who assume that researching purpose is more advantageous.
It must be vital to acknowledge that wildlife Change preposition
of
creature
Fix the agreement mistake
creatures
is
one of the most necessary factors to Correct subject-verb agreement
are
main
the balance in the environmental Correct your spelling
maintain
habitants
. Correct your spelling
habitats
In other words
, Linking Words
animals
will remain the Use synonyms
number
of Use synonyms
species
in the ecosystem stably in order to avoid the extinction of one Use synonyms
species
by the predating way. Use synonyms
As a result
, the Linking Words
majory
of Correct your spelling
majority
the
dangerous Correct article usage
apply
animals
still continually stay Use synonyms
the
safe Correct article usage
apply
number
for other life to live in, including Use synonyms
the
human civilization. Correct article usage
apply
According to
some scientific studies about the Linking Words
quantity
of creatures globally, approximately a third of Change the quantifier
number
animals
Use synonyms
was
Verb problem
have
dissappeared
in the world leading to Correct your spelling
disappeared
the
increasing Correct article usage
an
number
of other mutation Use synonyms
species
, which can be dangerous to Use synonyms
the
Correct article usage
apply
human
Fix the agreement mistake
humans
due to
the out of control Linking Words
naturally
.
Some critics, Replace the word
nature
however
, Linking Words
confims
their idea of Correct your spelling
confirm
utilizering
Correct your spelling
utilising
animals
as the equipment for research. They Use synonyms
believes
that Change the verb form
believe
animals
Use synonyms
was
born so as to improve the quality of human life, Change the verb form
were
such
as Linking Words
discovering
Change preposition
by discovering
the
pharmaceutical medicines or cutting-edge treatments for many illnesses. Correct article usage
apply
This
may be true, but if the amount of Linking Words
animal
died because of those experiments, Fix the agreement mistake
animals
this
would cause the extinction of many invaluable Linking Words
species
and many other social and health issues. Take China as a pertinent example, where most of the Use synonyms
preciously
genetic Correct your spelling
previously
animals
Use synonyms
was
Change the verb form
were
extincted
over the past few decades, motivating Correct your spelling
extinct
to
the growth of the Change preposition
apply
animals
' dead Use synonyms
body
that affected Fix the agreement mistake
bodies
to
Change preposition
apply
the
society's beauty and public health.
From Correct article usage
apply
this
writer's perspective, the Linking Words
Use synonyms
animals
rights would be the priority on the Change to a genitive case
animal's
animals'
ground
of their assistance to environmentally problematic enhancement. Fix the agreement mistake
grounds
This
is because not only can many wild Linking Words
creature
help to improve the quality of the environment, but they clear the waste released from the great Change to a plural noun
creatures
number
of factories globally. Use synonyms
For
Linking Words
this
reason, Linking Words
Use synonyms
animals
Fix the agreement mistake
animal
Use synonyms
right
could be like the accomplishment medals for their contribution and Replace the word
rights
preserve
from Replace the word
preservation
the poach
. The UK is a prime example, they prohibited people from killing Wrong verb form
poaching
animals
and Use synonyms
give
Wrong verb form
gave
animals
Use synonyms
Use synonyms
right
as Fix the agreement mistake
rights
a
official regulation to protect them.
Taking all points into account, Change the article
an
the
animal preservation by Correct article usage
apply
animals
Use synonyms
Use synonyms
right
can be meaningful by their help in the environmental balance and the new solution to reduce Replace the word
rights
the
pollution worldwide. Correct article usage
apply
Therefore
, it should have been demonstrated that Linking Words
Use synonyms
animals
Fix the agreement mistake
animal
Use synonyms
right
Replace the word
rights
is
more beneficial for the humankind communities.Correct subject-verb agreement
are
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Task Achievement
Your essay presents a clear stance and discusses both views, but try to use more specific examples to robustly support your arguments. This will make your essay more convincing.
General
Work on your grammar and spelling to avoid misunderstandings and improve clarity. Attention to detail can elevate your writing significantly.
Coherence and Cohesion
Your essay structure is good, but strive for smoother transitions between paragraphs and within them to enhance the flow of your ideas.
Introduction
You have a clear thesis that sets the direction for your essay, effectively guiding the reader through your argument.
Conclusion
The conclusion effectively summarizes your stance and the main points discussed, reinforcing your argument.
Task Achievement
Your essay demonstrates a strong understanding of the topic and addresses both sides of the argument, showing a balanced perspective.
Include an introduction and conclusion
A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.
The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.
The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:
- Summary
- Restatement of thesis
- Prediction or recommendation
Example:
To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.
Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:
- In conclusion
- To conclude
- To summarize
- Finally
- In a nutshell
- In general