Today our communications, medicine and transport systems all depend on computer technology. Our reliance on computer technology in these fields has created a dangerous situation. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?
#communications #medicine #transport #systems #depend #computer #technology #reliance #fields #situation
the 21st century, technological development in computer systems is ever-increasing. Many sectors
such
as communication, medicine and transportation highly depend on this
technology. Some believe that dependence on such
computer technology has led to dangerous situations. I agree with this
statement and facts related to my view will be discussed.
Firstly
, in order to run these computer-aided platforms, the availability of electricity is a must in most cases. but, there can be some unexpected power failures that can cause malfunctioning of connected devices. This
can lead to bad consequences in fields such
as communication, medicine and transport because these systems transfer data via the Internet. For instance
, a Patient can die in a hospital if he is given the wrong medicine because of such
issues.
On top of that, users of some of these services might have to face severe life threats as their privacy can be disclosed in society. For example
, it is a simple task for hackers and dark website developers to sneak into online facilitated devices and hack the data. Moreover
, information can be changed according to
their need. As a result
of these actions, the accuracy of the data will be lost and this
can lead to an increase in roadside accidents as most of these routes are signalized at junctions.
In conclusion, although
there are a lot of benefits of advancements in computer-based technology for individuals, it is not wise to rely solely on these programming methods. Expertise needs to find some alternative ways to ensure the security and preciseness of these programmes.Submitted by wm.asanka.sandaruwan on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
General advice
Continue to structure your essays as you've done here, addressing the prompt fully while using a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. This enhances the essay's accessibility and comprehension.
Task Achievement
To improve, try deepening the analysis of your examples. Explain how the examples support your argument in more depth. While you've provided relevant examples, adding more analysis could enhance the overall impact.
Coherence and Cohesion
It's beneficial to ensure the transition between paragraphs and ideas is smooth. You've done well with this, but further refinement in linking sentences more explicitly can increase coherence. This helps in making your argumentation even more persuasive.
Structure
Excellent structure with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion
Use of Examples
Effective use of examples to support your points
Relevance
Good job maintaining focus on the topic throughout the essay without drifting off-topic