Some people say that being a bisinessman is burdening,while others believe that entrepreneurship gives the chance to live like the individual wants.To what extent do you agree

#people #bisinessman #entrepreneurship #chance

Some are of the opinion that owning a

business

brings burden,

while

some others think being an entrepreneur gives choice for a

person

to live in a way he

want

Change the verb form

wants

show examples

to.I agree that an entrepreneur

had

Wrong verb form

have

show examples

flexibility

Correct article usage

the flexibility

show examples

and freedom to design a life they would love to live. First of all, the job of an entrepreneur comes

Change preposition

apply

show examples

with many responsibilities, predominantly the management of several departments without flaws on a day-to-day basis.

Moreover

, a

business man

Correct your spelling

businessman

show examples

must

satisy

Correct your spelling

satisfy

his/her employees in

such

a way that

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

the laymen would develop trust towards the company which in turn results in longer relationships with the organization.

For instance

, it is highly important to identify and reward people who

performs

Change the verb form

perform

show examples

well.

In addition

, a businessman is

also

liable to follow the rules and regulations and stay compliant

Change preposition

with

show examples

the governing authorities.To cite an example, one of the famous businessmen in India, was recently caught by the National Investigation Agency for not paying

full

Correct article usage

the full

show examples

tax amount as per the records.All these aspects can lead

worries

Change preposition

to worries

show examples

and

burden

Fix the agreement mistake

burdens

show examples

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

when a single

person

owns a

business

. Despite all these drawbacks, there are several positive factors that can be considered, being an

entreprener

Correct your spelling

entrepreneur

Firstly

, it provides freedom to the

person

who runs the

business

Change preposition

For

show examples

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

instance, he/she does not have to rely on someone to

take

Correct your spelling

make

show examples

descisions

Correct your spelling

decisions

during crucial times.

Secondly

, it provides flexibility in all sectors of

business

.To explain

further

, when a single

person

manages a

business

, one has the opportunity to expand to various parts of the world

according to

their own preferences.

Lastly

, profit is not shared with anyone which is a huge win for any businessman.

This

helps them to

buid

Correct your spelling

build

an empire of their own prospects. In short, running a

business

has got both benefits and

disadvatages

Correct your spelling

disadvantages

.Considering the

postive

Correct your spelling

positive

sides of it, I

beleive

Correct your spelling

believe

that an

enterpreneur

Correct your spelling

entrepreneur

can make independent decisions , enjoy freedom

as well as

earn

better

Correct article usage

a better

show examples

income.

Therefore

, they have higher chances of

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

living

Correct article usage

the

show examples

life they intend to.

Submitted by gloriasherin on Sat May 11 2024

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Language Accuracy

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Coherence & Cohesion

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Task Achievement

Expand your examples with more specific details to strengthen your arguments. This can provide a more solid foundation for your viewpoints and enhance the reader's understanding.

Task Achievement

Your essay provides a balanced view on the topic, effectively addressing both sides before stating your own position. This is excellent for task achievement.

Coherence & Cohesion

You have effectively used paragraphs to structure your essay, separating different ideas logically, which aids in reader comprehension.

Coherence & Cohesion

Introduction and conclusion are well-presented, succinctly summarizing the main points and your stance, contributing to a coherent structure.

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14Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
26Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

323 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people say that being a bisinessman is burdening,while others believe that entrepreneurship gives the chance to live like the individual wants.To what extent do you agree

Write a letter to your landlord about an increase in rent that you don't think is justified. In your letter say: - Why you are writing - What the problems are - What you want the landlord to do

A growing number of people feel that animals should not be exploited by people and that they should have the same rights as humans, while others argue that humans must employ animals to satisfy their various needs, including uses for research.

In many countries, paying for things using mobile phone (cellphone) apps is becoming increasingly common. Does this development have more advantages or more disadvantages?

Some people believe that the government should spend more money putting in more works of art like paintings and statues in cities to make them better places to live in. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people think that when recruiting, companies should aim to take on people who are innovative and able to work independently while others considered they should recruit people who are able to work in a team and follow instructions. Discuss both views.