Some people think that workers like nurses, doctors and teachers do not get enough payment while film actors and athletes get more money than the importance of their job. How far do you agree or disagree?
#people #workers #nurses #doctors #teachers #payment #film #actors #athletes #money #importance #job
Every occupation has a different range of
salaries
which is influenced by many factors like how important the job role is, the industry's revenue, and the company's capability. In fact, I strongly agree with those who feel that Use synonyms
nurses
, Use synonyms
doctors
and Use synonyms
teachers
do not get enough Use synonyms
money
Use synonyms
while
Linking Words
people
who Use synonyms
work
in the entertainment industry are paid more.
Workers like Use synonyms
nurses
, Use synonyms
doctors
, and Use synonyms
teachers
are Use synonyms
people
working in critical fields - health and education, Use synonyms
thus
I think they deserve to gain a high salary. They play crucial roles in society since they make real and impactful contributions either to Linking Words
people
's health or education. Let us not forget about how hard Use synonyms
doctors
and Use synonyms
nurses
Use synonyms
work
when covid-19 pandemic happened in almost every country. They gave their full support and bet their life to provide the best health services to Use synonyms
people
. Use synonyms
However
, lately in Indonesia, there has been a Linking Words
government
regulation that degrades internship Use synonyms
doctors
' Use synonyms
salaries
which Use synonyms
then
drove many Linking Words
doctors
to hold a demonstration. Use synonyms
This
case can be proof of the injustice of Linking Words
government
behaviour in treating Use synonyms
doctors
.
Use synonyms
On the other hand
, film Linking Words
actors
and athletes get more Use synonyms
money
Use synonyms
whereas
they Linking Words
work
in a non-priority area. High market demand may be one of the reasons why they have high earnings. Many Use synonyms
people
are fascinated with Use synonyms
actors
, even Use synonyms
they
want to spend Correct pronoun usage
apply
money
to attend their idols' fan meetings. I think the more popular the Use synonyms
actors
, the higher the earnings they can get. In social media, we often see that it is really easy for them to buy a new car and have a vacation abroad. They Use synonyms
also
often show off their branded bags like Hermes or Gucci. From Linking Words
this
phenomenon, we can easily guess that they have a huge amount of Linking Words
money
that they gain from acting or sport. Use synonyms
Although
it feels Linking Words
not fair
, a very small Correct word choice
unfair
government
role in Use synonyms
this
industry may Linking Words
also
be the factor why they can get more Linking Words
money
. What I mean by Use synonyms
this
, is that Linking Words
nurses
, Use synonyms
doctors
, and Use synonyms
teachers
usually are Use synonyms
government
employees, and their Use synonyms
salaries
are very dependent on the Use synonyms
Use synonyms
government
ability to pay them.
In conclusion, I think it is a common thing we know that Change noun form
government's
nurses
, Use synonyms
doctors
, and Use synonyms
teachers
get lower Use synonyms
salaries
than Use synonyms
actors
and athletes. I believe it is unfair treatment since they Use synonyms
work
in critical fields. Even so, I suggest that if they want to get more Use synonyms
money
, they can pursue their career to Use synonyms
work
in the private sector.Use synonyms
Submitted by mmmuuu on
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coherence cohesion
Enhance complexity and variety in your sentences to further improve coherence.
task achievement
Consider expanding your discussion with a wider range of examples and deeper analysis for each point.
task achievement
Your essay effectively addresses the prompt, presenting a clear position throughout the response.
coherence cohesion
You have a good structure in your essay, with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion.
task achievement
Your main points are well-supported by relevant examples, enhancing the argument's persuasiveness.
Word Count
IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.
A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.
Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.