Why teenagers are on the rise doing criminal activities worldwide?what are the causes and possible solutions

I agree with the
statements
Fix the agreement mistake
statement
show examples
that teenagers are
mosty
Correct your spelling
mostly
involved in criminal
activities
. As teenagers are immature,they don't
knows
Change the verb form
know
show examples
whats
Correct your spelling
what's
show examples
wrong or
whats
Correct your spelling
what's
show examples
right
moreever
Correct your spelling
moreover
more ever
,poverty may be another reason for that. And lack of proper
guidances
Fix the agreement mistake
guidance
show examples
,they
donot
Correct your spelling
do not
know the
conesquences
Correct your spelling
consequences
for
Change preposition
of
show examples
doing that dangerous activity. Starting with poverty.
In
Correct your spelling
An
show examples
early age
children
mostly try to earn money, as many
children
want to
suppose
Verb problem
support
show examples
their family
hence
, When they don't find any job
then
they get attached
With
Change preposition
To
show examples
such
activities
.As
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
was watching
news
Add an article
the news
show examples
that day"i boy of age 17 was involved in
robbery
Correct article usage
a robbery
show examples
"When
police
Correct article usage
the police
show examples
investigated he said that he
need
Wrong verb form
needed
show examples
money for his
mother
Change noun form
mother's
show examples
operation
laterly
Correct your spelling
later
,
police
Correct article usage
the police
show examples
found that his mother was in hospital. And lack of proper guidance
maybe
Correct your spelling
may be
show examples
one factor.
in
Change preposition
At
show examples
early ages
children
are immature so, they don't
knows
Change the verb form
know
show examples
whats
wrong and
whats
Correct your spelling
what's
show examples
right.They
dont
Correct your spelling
don't
know the consequences they will face
after
this
.Mostly, parents are uneducated so
due to
lack
Correct article usage
a lack
show examples
of proper guidance
children
get
attach
Wrong verb form
attached
show examples
to
such
activities
. As
Its
Change the pronoun
It
show examples
said
that
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
"every problem has a solution" we can
also
minimize
such
issues.
According to
me
Add a comma
,
show examples
government should provide Jobs to needy ones So,by
this
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
doing
this
Change the determiner
this child
these children
show examples
children
will be less involved in
such
activities
,As their basic
need
Fix the agreement mistake
needs
show examples
will be
full
Change the adjective
fully
show examples
filled.
Their
Replace the word
There
show examples
should be
proper
Correct article usage
a proper
show examples
Seminar for younger ones. where They should be guided , what to do what not to .
Thier
Correct your spelling
There
should be proper
counseling
Change the spelling
counselling
show examples
session
Fix the agreement mistake
sessions
show examples
for younger ones.
Ther
Correct your spelling
There
show examples
should be strict regulations for everyone So, those who break
law
Add an article
the law
show examples
should be punished. So, if we
adapt
Correct your spelling
adopt
show examples
such
changes,we will change
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
our environment.Where trends of teenagers involved in criminal
activities
will decrease
Submitted by sammama250 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Language Use
Consider using a wider range of vocabulary to express ideas more precisely and vary sentence structure for a richer reading experience.
Grammar
Pay attention to correct punctuation and sentence structure to improve clarity and readability.
Coherence & Cohesion
Enhance coherence by utilizing linking phrases effectively to connect ideas within and across paragraphs.
Introduction
For a stronger introduction, clearly state the essay topic and outline the main points that will be discussed.
Conclusion
In the conclusion, ensure to recap the main ideas discussed and possibly suggest a final recommendation or opinion.
Task Achievement
You have addressed the reasons and possible solutions to the rise in criminal activities among teenagers, which closely aligns with the task requirements.
Use of Examples
Your essay includes specific examples, which helps in supporting your main points and making your argument more convincing.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

You are not ready for IELTS Speaking, if you

  • Can’t speak smoothly without pauses.
  • Use simple words and lack vocabulary.
  • Feel nervous and anxious when speaking.
What to do next:
Look at other essays:

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!