IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

The graph below shows the spending of UK residents on visits abroad between 1993 and 2013. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The graph below shows the spending of UK residents on visits abroad between 1993 and 2013. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
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The diagram provides information about
the
Correct article usage
apply
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UK citizens' expenditures on travelling to foreign countries for various purposes from 1993 to 2013.
Overall
Linking Words
, the graph illustrates that spending on abroad journeys mostly grew during the whole period
nevertheless
Linking Words
, the different travelling reasons took various amounts of money. The entire quantity of billions spent on holidays started to grow from nine and reached its peak of about 25
billion
Use synonyms
 in 2008.
However
Linking Words
, it dropped
down
Change preposition
apply
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to 22
billion
Use synonyms
 in 2009 because of
crisis
Correct article usage
the crisis
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 growth
has
Unnecessary verb
apply
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stopped for four years and only after that problems grew again to the level of almost 24
billion
Use synonyms
 pounds in the year of 2013.
Likewise
Linking Words
, the line of the friend visits spending started from the number of 1
billion
Use synonyms
 in 1993 and grew gradually until the quantity of 5
billion
Use synonyms
.
In contrast
Linking Words
, the business and the miscellaneous spending started from levels 2 and 1
billion
Use synonyms
 pounds respectively and were not rising
so
Correct word choice
as
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 fast as other voyage expenses and finished with the numbers of 5 and 1.5
billion
Use synonyms
 pounds simultaneously in 2013.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words billion with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
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