It is important for children to learn the difference between right and wrong at an early age. Punishment is necessary to help them learn this distinction. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion? What sort of punishments should parents and teachers be allowed to use to teach good behaviour for children?

Throughout
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
history, raising children has been one of the most paramount challenges of a human's life. In many underdeveloped
countries
Add a comma
countries,
show examples
the tradition of physically punishing a child for a mistake is still famous
whereas
for
Change preposition
in
show examples
developed countries the ratio of physically abusing children is less, though still
practiced
Change the spelling
practised
show examples
. In
this
scenario
according to
surveys and what I have personally observed,
tuarmenting
Correct your spelling
tormenting
a child can not be a solution to make them understand in most cases, as generally it
back fires
Correct your spelling
backfires
show examples
and
instead
tunes the mentality of
a children
Correct the article-noun agreement
children
a child
show examples
to become more secretive. The punishments which parents should resort to
is
Wrong verb form
are
show examples
very subjective,
it
Correct pronoun usage
they
show examples
generally
reflects
Correct subject-verb agreement
reflect
show examples
the
Change the word
their
show examples
upbringing
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
themselves
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
and what
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society has taught them, but
overall
approaching
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
a punishment with warmth and firmness can be more effective comparitivily.
Submitted by shahjahanrajan on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

structure
Your essay presents a thoughtful perspective on the issue of punishment and child discipline, highlighting the importance of understanding its impact. To improve, ensure a clearer distinction between your introduction, main points, and conclusion for enhanced readability.
examples
Incorporate a wider range of examples and evidence to support your points. This will strengthen your argument and provide a comprehensive view on the subject.
grammar
Consider refining your essay by checking for and correcting minor spelling and grammatical errors. These adjustments can greatly improve the overall clarity and professionalism of your essay.
coherence
To enhance the coherence of your essay, work on creating smoother transitions between paragraphs. Use linking words and phrases to connect ideas more effectively, aiding the reader's understanding.
understanding
Your essay shows a good understanding of the topic and presents a nuanced view, acknowledging the complexity of disciplining children.
engagement
You engage with the topic on a personal and societal level, providing insight into differing perspectives on punishment and discipline in children.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

You are not ready for IELTS Speaking, if you

  • Can’t speak smoothly without pauses.
  • Use simple words and lack vocabulary.
  • Feel nervous and anxious when speaking.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Morality
  • Responsible
  • Psychological impact
  • Reinforcement
  • Positive discipline
  • Cultural perceptions
  • Punitive measures
  • Empathetic understanding
  • Personality development
  • Caregivers
  • Legal boundaries
  • Ethical boundaries
  • Behavioural correction
  • Negative reinforcement
  • Positive reinforcement
  • Corporal punishment
  • Time-out
  • Grounding
  • Behavioral modeling
What to do next:
Look at other essays:

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!