The higher proportion of older population will over take younger generation what is the reason? is it positive or negative development?
With the startling pace of social and scientific development in recent decades, the
poplulation
of Correct your spelling
population
the
Correct article usage
apply
senior
is growing, Fix the agreement mistake
seniors
eventually
, it will exceed the younger generation. In Correct word choice
and eventually
such
Linking Words
circumstance
, disadvantageous effects are unavoidable.
There are a few sound reasons contributing to the growth of the aged Fix the agreement mistake
circumstances
population
. First of all, owing to improvements in science, medication, and Use synonyms
techonology
, Correct your spelling
technology
people
tend to live healthier and longer in today's world. Many Use synonyms
diceases
and Correct your spelling
diseases
sickness
are no longer incurable, Fix the agreement mistake
sicknesses
for example
, Linking Words
tubeculosis
(TB) was a death sentence to some Correct your spelling
tuberculosis
people
decades ago, but lives can be saved if the Use synonyms
paitients
are sent to hospital at an early stage. Another important factor is nowadays concept regarding family structure. Correct your spelling
patients
According to
a survey in Shanghai, China, nuclear families accounted for 70% and among them, over half Linking Words
families
would choose to have only one child. Change preposition
of families
As a result
, the senior Linking Words
population
will outnumber the minor in Use synonyms
a
near future.
We cannot deny that Correct article usage
the
this
trend will bring a few negative consequences. Linking Words
To begin
with, the retiring Linking Words
population
will impose Use synonyms
a
great pressure on the government to maintain a satisfying healthcare system and pension policies. Remove the article
apply
In addition
, there will be a lack of labour force especially in the industries which need the employees to be physically fit. Linking Words
For example
, construction work and service industry, to Linking Words
certain
extent, Add an article
a certain
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
hinders
Correct subject-verb agreement
hinder
the
economic development. In Correct article usage
apply
this
case, Linking Words
joint
family style should be encouraged so that young Correct article usage
a joint
people
can shoulder the responsibilities of taking care of the elders, Use synonyms
meanwhile
government and industries should promote incentives to encourage young Add a comma
meanwhile,
people
to conduct manual work.
In conclusion, as every field is developing day by day, life expectancy is expanded. The Use synonyms
fast growing
old Add a hyphen
fast-growing
population
can Use synonyms
casue
issues but I believe no matter how complicated the issue is now, the measures outlined above would constitute a good first step.Correct your spelling
cause
Submitted by carriexue23 on
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Task Response
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Task Response
The essay adequately addresses the prompt, providing a reasoned argument regarding the implications of a growing older population.
Coherence & Cohesion
Well-organized paragraphs and a clear structure contribute to the overall coherence of the essay.
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