Some people think that people moving to a new country should accept new culture in the foreign country. Others think that they should live in a separate minority group with different lifestyle. Discuss both the views and give your opinion.

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It is often argued that
individual
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individuals
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travelling to
the
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apply
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different
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country
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countries
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should consider
new
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a new
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culture
while
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other
Fix the agreement mistake
others
show examples
opine that they should reside in their own religious group with their lifestyles. In
this
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essay , I will discuss both views . On
one
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the one
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hand , when
people
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are commuting to
new
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a new
show examples
place they should explore
themselve
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themselves
with the different
culture
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cultures
show examples
and
custom
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customs
show examples
they follow.
This
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will help them to be more socialise with the
people
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living
their
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there
show examples
and develop a bond of good relationship with them.
Furthermore
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, it will assist them to stay at the new place more
comfortabely
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comfortably
comfortable
and create
a
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apply
show examples
respect for the culture that
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foriegn
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foreign
residents follow. It can
also
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initiate the
person
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to learn
the
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apply
show examples
new skills that include
the
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a
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Use synonyms
foriegn
Correct your spelling
foreign
language which can later be used for
the
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apply
show examples
better living . Communication errors can
also
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be decreased and
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apply
show examples
the
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apply
show examples
stability
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of
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for
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of
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the job can
be obtain
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be obtained
show examples
.
Moreover
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, religious
barrier
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barriers
show examples
and discrimination can
also
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be reduced. Apart
form
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from
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this
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, adapting the
custom
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customs
show examples
of one's
country
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can
also
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help in
long
Add an article
a long
show examples
stay in that
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foriegn
Correct your spelling
foreign
country
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.
On the other hand
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, staying in their own community in
different
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a different
show examples
country
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can only bind the
person
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with limited knowledge about that nation. It can lack the communication
skill
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skills
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as
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person
Add an article
a person
the person
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will be more comfortable with
its
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their
his
her
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own mother tongue and face
alot
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a lot
of
situation
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situations
show examples
to find a job or to stay for a longer time.
In addition
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to
this
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, the
person
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will become less
socialise
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socialised
show examples
and preserved
due to
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which they will not be able to explore
themselve
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themselves
to the new tourist attractions in that
country
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. No mental growth will be observed. No
doubht
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doubt
, staying in their own community
help
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helps
show examples
them to remember
about
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apply
show examples
their own cultures and traditions
that
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apply
show examples
should not
be vanished
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vanish
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off
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apply
show examples
. In my opinion, I believe that
although
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an individual plans to stay in the
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foriegn
Correct your spelling
foreign
country
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with
thier
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their
own religious group
pf
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of
show examples
people
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but
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apply
show examples
they should
also
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explore thesmelve with the lifestyle of the
country
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and socialise with the
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foriegn
Correct your spelling
foreign
people
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to
stay
Verb problem
have
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stressfree
Correct article usage
a stressfree
show examples
life.
Submitted by gp04101995 on

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coherence cohesion
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coherence cohesion
Ensure you proofread your essay to correct minor grammatical errors and improve overall fluency.
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Develop your arguments further with more detailed examples and explanations to enrich your response.
coherence cohesion
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coherence cohesion
You've provided a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion, which makes your essay easy to follow.
task achievement
Your essay addresses the task directly and offers a balanced discussion of both views as well as your own opinion, which is excellent for task achievement.
task achievement
Use of specific examples to support your opinions strengthens your arguments and contributes to task achievement.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • assimilate
  • social cohesion
  • integration
  • navigating the job market
  • cultural preservation
  • sense of belonging
  • heritage
  • multiculturalism
  • cultural landscape
  • support network
  • transition
  • multicultural society
  • mutual respect
  • cultural identity
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