Some people think that people moving to a new country should accept new culture in the foreign country. Others think that they should live in a separate minority group with different lifestyle. Discuss both the views and give your opinion.

It is often argued that
individual
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individuals
show examples
travelling to
the
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apply
show examples
different
country
Fix the agreement mistake
countries
show examples
should consider
new
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a new
show examples
culture
while
other
Fix the agreement mistake
others
show examples
opine that they should reside in their own religious group with their lifestyles. In
this
essay , I will discuss both views . On
one
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the one
show examples
hand , when
people
are commuting to
new
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a new
show examples
place they should explore
themselve
Correct your spelling
themselves
with the different
culture
Fix the agreement mistake
cultures
show examples
and
custom
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customs
show examples
they follow.
This
will help them to be more socialise with the
people
living
their
Correct your spelling
there
show examples
and develop a bond of good relationship with them.
Furthermore
, it will assist them to stay at the new place more
comfortabely
Correct your spelling
comfortably
comfortable
and create
a
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apply
show examples
respect for the culture that
foriegn
Correct your spelling
foreign
residents follow. It can
also
initiate the
person
to learn
the
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apply
show examples
new skills that include
the
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a
show examples
foriegn
Correct your spelling
foreign
language which can later be used for
the
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apply
show examples
better living . Communication errors can
also
be decreased and
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apply
show examples
the
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apply
show examples
stability
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of
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for
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of
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the job can
be obtain
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be obtained
show examples
.
Moreover
, religious
barrier
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barriers
show examples
and discrimination can
also
be reduced. Apart
form
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from
show examples
this
, adapting the
custom
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customs
show examples
of one's
country
can
also
help in
long
Add an article
a long
show examples
stay in that
foriegn
Correct your spelling
foreign
country
.
On the other hand
, staying in their own community in
different
Add an article
a different
show examples
country
can only bind the
person
with limited knowledge about that nation. It can lack the communication
skill
Fix the agreement mistake
skills
show examples
as
person
Add an article
a person
the person
show examples
will be more comfortable with
its
Correct pronoun usage
their
his
her
show examples
own mother tongue and face
alot
Correct your spelling
a lot
of
situation
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situations
show examples
to find a job or to stay for a longer time.
In addition
to
this
, the
person
will become less
socialise
Wrong verb form
socialised
show examples
and preserved
due to
which they will not be able to explore
themselve
Correct your spelling
themselves
to the new tourist attractions in that
country
. No mental growth will be observed. No
doubht
Correct your spelling
doubt
, staying in their own community
help
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helps
show examples
them to remember
about
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apply
show examples
their own cultures and traditions
that
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apply
show examples
should not
be vanished
Wrong verb form
vanish
show examples
off
Change preposition
apply
show examples
. In my opinion, I believe that
although
an individual plans to stay in the
foriegn
Correct your spelling
foreign
country
with
thier
Correct your spelling
their
own religious group
pf
Correct your spelling
of
show examples
people
but
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apply
show examples
they should
also
explore thesmelve with the lifestyle of the
country
and socialise with the
foriegn
Correct your spelling
foreign
people
to
stay
Verb problem
have
show examples
stressfree
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a stressfree
show examples
life.
Submitted by gp04101995 on

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coherence cohesion
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coherence cohesion
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coherence cohesion
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task achievement
Your essay addresses the task directly and offers a balanced discussion of both views as well as your own opinion, which is excellent for task achievement.
task achievement
Use of specific examples to support your opinions strengthens your arguments and contributes to task achievement.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • assimilate
  • social cohesion
  • integration
  • navigating the job market
  • cultural preservation
  • sense of belonging
  • heritage
  • multiculturalism
  • cultural landscape
  • support network
  • transition
  • multicultural society
  • mutual respect
  • cultural identity
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