Today more and more people want things instantly (e.g goods, service, news) Why is this ? Is it a positive or negative development ?

In light of the proliferation of
technology
, an increasing number of individuals tend to require necessities immediately.
This
is understandably attributable to the advanced
technology
leading to the faster pace of life. The writer contends that
this
is an adverse enhancement causing a lack of perseverance and patience. It must be acknowledged that digital equipment has significantly influenced and facilitated our lives. Regardless of the distance between individuals,
technology
has transcended geographical barriers catering to instant communication through social media or e-mail.
Therefore
, the requirements of customers are more likely to be fulfilled quickly contributing to numerous orders which means the life pace will surge fast.
For example
, online marketing and delivering services are getting popular,
whilst
Correct word choice
and
show examples
people can get things rapidly
by
Change preposition
with
show examples
just a click on a commercial website or a call to
wholesales
Fix the agreement mistake
wholesale
show examples
.
Thus
, leading to a concept of desiring stuff immediately. Notwithstanding the benefits
technology
provides,
this
inclination towards immediate gratification is not without its drawbacks. Those who depended on apparatus tend to be impatience and lack
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
persistence. The process of investing time and effort plays a crucial role in the development and
further
quality of a person. By prioritizing instant outcomes, individuals may be discouraged from enduring challenges and setbacks, hindering their
overall
progress. In conclusion, the surging desire for instant demand is caused by advanced technological gadgets. Despite the possible advantages, users must consider the negative drawbacks of personal development

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Task Achievement
For a higher score in task achievement, ensure to directly address all parts of the prompt, not only explaining the reasons for the trend and its negative impacts but also discussing the positive sides explicitly when the question asks if it is a positive or negative development.
Task Achievement
Incorporate more specific examples and detailed explanations to bolster your points. This will aid in making your arguments more persuasive and comprehensive.
Coherence and Cohesion
Enhance your essay's readability by improving transitions between paragraphs and ensuring each paragraph flows logically into the next. This could be through more varied and clear topic sentences and transitional phrases.
Coherence and Cohesion
Closing your essay with a stronger conclusion by summarizing both sides of the argument could provide a more balanced view and effectively wrap up your discussion.
Positive
Effective use of an introductory paragraph to set the context of the discussion.
Positive
The essay demonstrates a good range of vocabulary suitable for the topic.
Positive
Provides a clear stance on the issue from the beginning, which is maintained throughout the essay.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • instant gratification
  • digital platforms
  • fast-paced lifestyle
  • precious commodity
  • e-commerce platforms
  • 24/7 news cycles
  • accessibility
  • consumer behavior
  • efficiency
  • productivity
  • delayed gratification
  • pressure
  • advent
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