Some people believe government should spend money on New public buliding such as library and museum rather than renovating old buildings. To what extent do agree or disagree.

In the current era, with the startling pace of urbanization and modernization, new-built architectures spring off every day. Attitudes towards whether aged
buildings
should be
refurbilshed
Correct your spelling
refurbished
or not vary from person to person. I personally reckon that governments should allocate more budgets on public
infrustructure
Correct your spelling
infrastructure
instead
of renovation. Opponents would argue that some of the old architectures are historical heritages, it is undeniable that these places should be
reserved
Correct your spelling
preserved
show examples
and maintained.
Nevertheless
, it doesn't mean that governments should reconstruct all old
building
Fix the agreement mistake
buildings
show examples
. The large amount of work and high material cost will bring
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
heavy economic burdens to the government,
however
, with a reasonable budget attribution, new public
buildings
can be constructed
such
as libraries and museums which better serve the local residents' needs as they are
also
the
tax payers
Correct your spelling
taxpayers
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.
In addition
, a large amount of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
obsolete
buildings
were built decades or even
centries
Correct your spelling
centuries
show examples
ago. The quality and space utilization do not fit today's needs even after the time-consuming and expensive renovation.
While
the population boosted in recent decades, high-rise
buildings
and
skycrapers
Correct your spelling
skyscrapers
emerged. Compared with aged
buildings
, these modern architectures are designed to be more safe and spacious for all
funtions
Correct your spelling
functions
.
For example
, when
natural
Correct article usage
a natural
show examples
disaster attacks the city,
such
as
the
Correct article usage
an
show examples
earthquake or
floods
Fix the agreement mistake
flood
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, aged houses will not be a safe shed for the
inhabitats
Correct your spelling
inhabitants
, it is too fragile to even save
itself
Correct pronoun usage
themselves
show examples
.
To conclude
, though some of the historical
buildings
have their value so that they should be reserved, I still believe, more money should be spent on new
buildings
which can serve the public with
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
better quality and better use design.
Submitted by carriexue23 on

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task achievement
Develop clearer, more comprehensive ideas throughout the essay. Try to elaborate more on key points to support your argument.
task achievement
Include more specific and relevant examples to strengthen your points and make your argument more convincing.
coherence cohesion
Ensure a logical progression of ideas by connecting them smoothly. Avoid abrupt changes in topics and maintain a consistent flow.
language use
Work on spelling and vocabulary accuracy. Correct spelling mistakes ('refurbilshed,' 'infrustructure', 'centries', etc.) and use more precise language.
task achievement
The essay presents a clear introduction, outlining the topic and your stance on the issue.
task achievement
The conclusion effectively summarizes the main points and reinforces your overall argument.
coherence cohesion
You have organized your essay into clear paragraphs, each focusing on a specific aspect of the topic.

Your opinion

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If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

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...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • modern architecture
  • cost-effective
  • sustainable design
  • cultural heritage
  • tangible connection
  • financial burden
  • updated facilities
  • public access
  • community identity
  • environmentally friendly
  • renovation
  • new construction
  • waste reduction
  • community impact
  • invigorate
  • modern amenities
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