some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortages of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Due to
the fact of the development of technologies, many people apply fast snacks in their main dishes.The writer of this
essay believes the pros of junk drinking outweigh the cons counterpart because of health problems and laziness.
To begin
with,affecting health may be one of the consequences that can appear.To be more specific, customers who consume convenient cuisine can easily become obese because making junk meals needs a variety of oils.Additionally
,in some restaurants, the oil after cooking can be reused which leads to cancer.Moreover
, fried oil can simulate cholesterol more consequently
consumer's face can experience a number of acne.For example
,in the USA after the occurrence of fast meat, the obesity rate with cancer shot up to 15% considering the number of buyers overusing fast cooking and reusing the oil.Hence
,junk feed can lead to a variety of strength issues.
On the other hand
,laziness is one of the core reasons that make using fast meal become disadvantageous.To put it simply,many users abuse eating fast fare for the reason that they are lazy.Furthermore
,the overuse of fast bread can create a gap between family members with each other.The reason why is each member has their own world so if buyers consume too much convenient cooking they may immersed in the purchaser's world and not want to have time to interact with others.For instance
,in The UK where plenty of families are too lazy to cook and the solution that those families choose is to buy fast food.Thus
, using too much fast meals can accelerate apathy.
By contrast
, one of the advantages can be found in saving occasion.To be more clear,in some situations, residents may not have enough occasion for cooking so citizens have to buy fast cooking to ensure having enough energy for work.
Also
,citizens sometimes may be fed up with normal cuisine they want to find new things to try.In this
position, fast foodstuff is the best choice for buyers.However
,hiring a houseworker to cook is better than eating a fast snack.
In conclusion,well-being issues and laziness are overpowered by saving money.Nevertheless
,hiring a worker for cooking can reduce energy problems and save date.Submitted by [email protected] on
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task achievement
To enhance task achievement, ensure that your argument directly addresses the essay prompt. The initial interpretation of the topic was not completely aligned with the original prompt, which caused some confusion. Focus more on the original topic related to accepting or improving bad situations.
coherence cohesion
Work on improving logical structure by arranging your arguments in a clear and coherent manner. Each paragraph should ideally contain one main idea supported by specific details. There were instances where the ideas seemed somewhat mixed and disorganized.
task achievement
Provide clear and comprehensive ideas throughout the essay. Some arguments weren't fully developed or explained, making them harder to follow.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that the introduction clearly outlines your position on the topic, and that each body paragraph logically supports this position. The conclusion should succinctly summarize the main points discussed in the essay.
task achievement
You provided relevant specific examples which helped to contextualize your arguments. This is a good practice to continue as it demonstrates your ability to support your points with factual information.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.