IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

The most important aim of science should be to improve people’s lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

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Nowadays, it is undeniable that technique plays an important role in plenty of aspects of human being’s
life
Use synonyms
 quality improvement. There are many innovations
were
Unnecessary verb
apply
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being created to solve problems that the population of the earth is coping with.
That is
Linking Words
 the reason I totally agree with the statement that the most significant goal of
science
Use synonyms
 is improving people’s
live
Replace the word
living
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 standards. There are various reasons that
illustrated
Wrong verb form
illustrate
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for
Change preposition
apply
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this
Linking Words
 perspective. First of all, thanks
for
Change preposition
to
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 the advancement of
science
Use synonyms
 and technology, today it is easier for people to grasp weather forecasts more accurately. It helps us more conveniently make decisions about moving or participating in outdoor activities.
Secondly
Linking Words
, the progress of
science
Use synonyms
 leads to learning new things and education more accessible.
For example
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, most universities offer online courses so that students are able to attend the
class
Fix the agreement mistake
classes
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although
Linking Words
 they are living far away.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, the influence of technology
as well as
Linking Words
science
Use synonyms
 on health aspect is noticeable. For
instant
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instance
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, vaccines saved several hearts during the COVID-19 pandemic, and if scientists had not discovered that, it would have killed a lot of people.
Therefore
Linking Words
, the progression of
science
Use synonyms
 has made us have
a
Change the article
an
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 easier and healthier
life
Use synonyms
.
On the other hand
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, despite the advancement of technology
is
Wrong verb form
being
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 really important in our
life
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, we should develop them but still under human
controlling
Replace the word
control
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.
About the
Change preposition
The
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 development of technologies,
such
Linking Words
 as artificial intelligence,
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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should
be go
Change the verb form
go
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along with
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 responsible use and thoughtful regulation to prevent
from
Change preposition
apply
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potential harm.
In addition
Linking Words
, a balance
among
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between
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 progress and ethical considerations is essential to ensure that the benefits of scientific discoveries are manageable and do not lead to any negative consequences.
To sum up
Linking Words
,
science
Use synonyms
 helped our lives become
more
Change the word
apply
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easier than before a lot. Human
life
Use synonyms
 will be significantly improved if we know how to develop it reasonably and responsibly.

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coherence cohesion
Work on developing a more logical structure for your essay. Consider using a clear paragraph structure with a topic sentence, followed by supporting details, and a concluding sentence for each paragraph.
task achievement
Ensure that all ideas are fully developed. Some points in your essay could benefit from further explanation or examples to make them clearer and more comprehensive.
general
Pay close attention to your grammar and vocabulary. Small errors and word choices can affect the clarity and coherence of your essay.
task achievement
Your essay clearly addresses the topic and provides relevant examples, such as the impact of vaccines during the COVID-19 pandemic.
coherence cohesion
You generally maintain a good flow throughout the essay, and your conclusion effectively summarizes the main points.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • crucial role
  • enhancing
  • quality of human life
  • advancements
  • medicine
  • healthcare
  • scientific research
  • solving societal problems
  • improving living standards
  • global issues
  • climate change
  • food scarcity
  • technological advancements
  • limitations
  • negative consequences
  • ethical considerations
  • sustainability
  • environmental preservation
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