Some young people are sent to prison for minor crimes. What are the advantages and disadvantages of such imprisonment?
Some minor
offenes
are punishable by prison terms. In modern times, the protection of human rights has become an important concept in the world, which is the reason for the stricter laws. In my opinion, strict law enforcement is good but sentencing young Correct your spelling
offences
people
to prison for minor offenses may be very harsh. The advantages and disadvantages of Use synonyms
this
argument will be thoroughly analysed and discussed in Linking Words
this
essay before drawing a conclusion.
Linking Words
Firstly
, on the plus side of Linking Words
this
topic, regardless of the severity of the crime, isolating the offender from society can help the offender become aware of his or her role and deter reoffending. Linking Words
For instance
, there was a violation where a person was sentenced to imprisonment for one month for insulting others in a public place in Linking Words
real
case. Add an article
a real
the real
In addition
to isolating the perpetrators from society, they should be given employment Linking Words
that is
Linking Words
usefull
to the community and contribute even a little to the development of the country. There are two sides to everything, there are pros, but we can't ignore the cons.
In the next section will discuss the disadvantages of the above topic. Specifically, Correct your spelling
useful
inccarcerting
young Correct your spelling
incarcerating
people
when they commit a crime can leave a dark mark on their fond memories of youth. Use synonyms
For example
, some movies or dramas are set in prisons and life in prisons is not portrayed very well and has very sad Linking Words
moment
. Fix the agreement mistake
moments
Furthemore
, as Correct your spelling
Furthermore
for
as Correct your spelling
far
human's
life Change noun form
human
concerned
time is more than important Add a missing verb
is concerned
Linking Words
above
all things.
To summarise, Change preposition
apply
people
can be made aware of their guilt by Use synonyms
to require
them to participate in a charity Change the verb form
requiring
cambaign
Correct your spelling
campaign
instead
of punishing to require them with jail time for minor crimes. What is more, a comparison of the pros and cons of the above statement shows considerable advantages, Linking Words
Linking Words
however
Add the comma(s)
however,
it is clear that
incarcerating young Linking Words
people
is not the best way to improve the future.Use synonyms
Submitted by bahyterkegl on
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introduction conclusion present
Your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which is great. However, the conclusion could be made stronger by summarizing the main points more effectively and offering a more definitive stance. Consider adding more depth to your summary to show a comprehensive understanding.
logical structure
There are a few grammatical and lexical errors throughout the essay, such as 'inccarcerting' instead of 'incarcerating' and 'as for as human's life concerned.' Make sure to proofread your essay to correct these mistakes, as they can disrupt the flow of your ideas.
supported main points
You have provided some relevant examples, like the public insult case, which help to illustrate your points. However, these examples could be more detailed and specific to make your arguments stronger. Try to include more concrete examples and develop them further.
coherence cohesion
Your ideas are generally clear, but some parts of the essay could benefit from better organization and clearer transitions. For example, the transition between discussing the benefits and the drawbacks could be smoother. Make sure each paragraph flows logically into the next.
complete response
The essay addresses the task well by discussing both the advantages and disadvantages of imprisoning young people for minor crimes. However, the analysis could be more balanced, with more in-depth discussion on how each point supports or detracts from the main argument.
introduction conclusion present
The introduction provides a clear statement of the topic and sets the context well. This helps to immediately engage the reader and set up the structure of the essay.
complete response
You have managed to present a balanced view by discussing both the pros and cons of the topic. This demonstrates your ability to see an issue from multiple perspectives.
supported main points
Your main points are distinct and relevant to the topic. This helps to maintain the focus of the essay and keeps the discussion on track.