Many young people do not spend their holidays and weekends doing outdoor activities like hiking and climbing in natural environments. Why is this the case? How can they be encouraged to go out?
By the millenniums
adults
preference about westing their weekend have been changed. Nowadays they tend to spend their weekend by not doing physical challenges on the outside. It has wrong Use synonyms
due to
the fact that, they dont have anough data about Linking Words
this
Linking Words
activities
.Teenagers will be involved Use synonyms
activities
in natural, if the company strong advertisement on social Use synonyms
platforms
.
Use synonyms
To begin
with, in Linking Words
this
field grown ups do not own knowladge about variety of outdoor Linking Words
activities
.They keep with belief that there is nothing exciting for youth .Use synonyms
For example
:In fact, there are more than 20 Linking Words
activities
in Utah,but only a few percent of Use synonyms
adults
know about it. Use synonyms
Thus
, lack of information about Linking Words
such
industry contribute Linking Words
adults
to choose an another option.
It is known that teenagers have addiction from social Use synonyms
platforms
. If Use synonyms
companies
whom belong the outdoor Use synonyms
activities
do a powerful PR on social Use synonyms
platforms
, it will become interesting for them to try it.
Use synonyms
For example
: in the Uzbekistan, Linking Words
companies
pay more attention on advertising their services both on social networking systems.Since it has been involved, more Use synonyms
then
half percent of visitors turning to teenagers.Linking Words
Therefore
, if Linking Words
companies
do more advertising in social Use synonyms
platforms
, more Use synonyms
adults
will be encouraged into climbing and e.d.
In conclusion,The main reason of the issue is that there are not enough data about challenges in natural environments.In order to copy with Use synonyms
this
Linking Words
companies
should care about public relation.Use synonyms
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task achievement
Make sure to proofread your essay to correct grammar and spelling errors. For example, 'westing' should be 'wasting' and 'knowladge' should be 'knowledge'.
coherence cohesion
A stronger conclusion can reinforce your points more effectively. Summarize your main points clearly and concisely.
task achievement
Providing more detailed and relevant specific examples can help to illustrate your points better. Cite real-world data or studies if possible.
coherence cohesion
Your essay lacks a bit in logical flow. Ensuring each paragraph transitions smoothly to the next will help in improving coherence. Using transitional words and phrases can help with this.
task achievement
Work on ensuring that each main point is well-supported with arguments and evidence. This will make your essay appear more convincing and comprehensive.
task achievement
Clarify your sentences, some are a bit difficult to understand due to wording. For example, 'grown ups do not own knowladge' can be rephrased to 'adults often lack knowledge'.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that the structure of your essay is logical and each paragraph deals with a single idea, supporting the main argument of that section.
task achievement
Your essay addresses the task prompt well by discussing both the reasons why young people are not engaging in outdoor activities and providing potential solutions.
coherence cohesion
You have a clear introduction and conclusion, which frames your discussion nicely.
task achievement
You identified social media as a potential solution, which is a relevant and insightful point given current trends.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.
Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.
When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.
Linking words for giving examples:
- for example
- for instance
- to illustrate this
- to give a clear example
- such as
- namely
- to illustrate
- take, for example