IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Traffic congestion is a continuous and growing problem in major cities. Some people recommend enforcing peak-hour tolls to cut back on the amount of cars using major commuting roads during rush hours. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this proposed solution?

#traffic #congestion #cities #people #peak-hour #tolls #amount #cars #roads #rush #hours
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Traffic
Use synonyms
 congestion is one of the major issues in
the
Correct article usage
apply
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tier-1 cities which is substantially growing. A
lot
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 of
people
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 have suggested
to introduce
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introducing
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 peak-hour
toll
Fix the agreement mistake
tolls
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 to curb
this
Linking Words
 issue completely. I will be discussing the advantages and disadvantages of
this
Linking Words
 issue, in my essay. To start with,
traffic
Use synonyms
 jams are one of the biggest problems tier-1 cities are facing. It is so problematic that even
government
Correct article usage
the government
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 is struggling hard to
erradicate
Correct your spelling
eradicate
 it from
the
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its
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 roots.
Traffice
Correct your spelling
Traffic
 jam is a serious problem, school students have to spend
Use synonyms
lot
Change the article
a lot
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 of time
in
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apply
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travelling same goes
with
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for
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office
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the office
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 going population. The time to commute has gone up drastically and
Use synonyms
lot
Change the article
a lot
show examples
 of
people
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 are now spending time on roads stuck in
traffic
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. In case of
medical
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a medical
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 emergency, it becomes very difficult to pass the congested area, and
as a
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result
Add a comma
result,
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 the patient has to suffer.
Moreover
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, peak hour tolls can give some relief, but with
growing
Add an article
a growing
the growing
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 population of India, the focus should be on convincing
people
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 to use public transport to large extent.
For instance
Linking Words
, Singapore has
special
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a special
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 discount for
people
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 who
travels
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travel
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 before the peak hours, the price of the metro rail ticket
,
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apply
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will be half of
actual
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the actual
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 price and
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lot
Correct article usage
a lot
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 of
people
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takes
Correct subject-verb agreement
take
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 advantage of
this
Linking Words
 scheme. Another instance where
Singapore
Correct article usage
the Singapore
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 government
has
Verb problem
apply
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imposed high taxes on privately owned
car
Fix the agreement mistake
cars
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, so
the
Correct your spelling
that
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car
Fix the agreement mistake
cars
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becomes
Correct subject-verb agreement
become
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 less affordable, which is not only good
to tackle
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for tackling
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 the problem of
the
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apply
show examples
traffic
Use synonyms
 but
also
Linking Words
 very helpful in saving the environment from pollution.
To conclude
Linking Words
, I would say that peak hour toll is just one option and we should focus more on improving the ways to tackle
the
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apply
show examples
traffic
Use synonyms
 congestion so that even poor
people
Use synonyms
 can afford to travel.
Submitted by neelima.sharma60 on

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task achievement
Consider providing more specific examples, statistics, or evidence to back up your points. This will strengthen your argument and give a clearer picture to the reader.
coherence cohesion
Try to avoid repetitive language. For instance, 'tier-1 cities' is used several times. Consider using synonyms or rephrasing to make the essay more engaging.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion.
task achievement
You addressed both advantages and disadvantages of the proposed solution, which shows a balanced perspective.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • traffic congestion
  • peak-hour tolls
  • rush hours
  • commuting roads
  • drivers
  • volume of traffic
  • revenue generation
  • public transportation
  • road congestion
  • economic impact
  • lower-income individuals
  • shifted congestion
  • implementation costs
  • electronic toll collection
  • infrastructure funding
What to do next:
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