Some people are making new friends by socializing network websites and internet chat rooms. Some people say that this is a good thing. Other people opine that people should make new friends by face to face chat. Discuss both views and given your own opinion.
It turned out a trend
making
new Change the verb form
to make
friends
in
social Change preposition
on
media
and keeping
in touch with them Wrong verb form
keep
with
the use of websites. Some Change preposition
through
people
think that it is good
way Change the article
a good
for socializing
, Change preposition
to socialize
however
, others believe that people
have to meet with their friends
, do outdoor activities and have face to
Add a hyphen
face-to-face
face
conversations. In my opinion, best
way is socializing in actual life but having online Add an article
the best
friends
also
good if you know how to balance your Add a missing verb
is also
time
while
surfing on internet.
The primary reason for this
is that people
sometimes can confuse their actual life
with social Fix the agreement mistake
lives
media
when they spend a lot of time
in it. And if
you have a friend online it means that you have Correct word choice
If
spend
Replace the word
spent
time
with her, and this
can make
some issues in your daily routine because of spending a lot of Verb problem
cause
time
on internet
. Add an article
the internet
That is
why you have to balance the time
that you spend with chatting. Nevertheless
, if they are able to control their time
then
it is a good way for socializing
because Change preposition
to socialize
while
they are making friends
from all over the world at the same time
they are learning about new places, cultures, religions, and languages.
Secondly
, spending time
with their friend while
they are next to them is the best thing for relieving stress. When people
are next to their loved ones, it makes them to forgot
about every Change the verb
forget
stressing
thing. Replace the word
stressful
Additionally
, nowadays everyone need
to put their phones down and spend Change the verb form
needs
time
without it
. Having Correct pronoun usage
them
face to
Add a hyphen
face-to-face
face
conversations one
of the best ways for being away from all that social Add a missing verb
is one
media
stuff.
All in all, if persons able to controll
the Correct your spelling
control
time
that they spend in
social Change preposition
on
media
then
having online friends
can be usefull
for their Correct your spelling
useful
life
and can make them happy, Fix the agreement mistake
lives
however
having friends
without distances between you is the best choice.Submitted by i.nureddinn on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
Coherence and Cohesion
Try to ensure that each paragraph remains fully focused on a single main idea. For instance, avoid mixing advantages and disadvantages in the same paragraph as it can confuse the reader.
Task Achievement
Include specific examples to support your points. For example, mention a specific situation or statistic related to online socializing or face-to-face interactions to strengthen your argument.
Language Accuracy
Proofread your essay for grammar and vocabulary usage. Avoid spelling errors and ensure that sentence structures are clear and accurate. This will make your writing more professional and easier to read.
Coherence and Cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps to frame and summarize your points well.
Task Achievement
You’ve addressed both views of the discussion prompt, which shows that you have engaged with the task fully.
Coherence and Cohesion
The overall structure of the essay, including paragraphs and flow of ideas, is good and easy to follow.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.
Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.
When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.
Linking words for giving examples:
- for example
- for instance
- to illustrate this
- to give a clear example
- such as
- namely
- to illustrate
- take, for example