Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortages of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

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One point of view supports that if some issues happen in our lives,

such

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as not having enough money or not enjoying the place of work, we should not do anything and should just accept it,

while

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others say that we need to handle everything and try our best to solve them.

This

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essay will argue that

although

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it seems to us that it is not impossible to control unexpected or bad situations, I strongly agree that the best decision is to do your best to solve the problem. On the one hand, there might be several life issues and it might be impossible to react to them positively. Unfortunately, we see the only action - to do nothing to solve it, accept the

situation

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and continue our lives.

Moreover

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, we think that nothing can change our

situation

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and it is too late to try and improve it.

For instance

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, in Kazakhstan, a lot of high school students choose their future professions and universities

due to

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government scholarships, which allow them to study for free. Thereby, after entering the universities, they discover that they made a wrong decision, because of choosing inappropriate professions for themselves.

As a result

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, they do nothing to solve their

situation

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and 60% of the population do not work in their studied fields of education.

On the other hand

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, the right decision, when a bad

situation

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happens, is to try your best and hope that it will be solved.

In other words

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, people face problems only when they can fix it. We should take the

situation

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as a life lesson and if we learn it,

this

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kind of issue will never happen.

For example

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, people who practice religion, like Islam can prove that every problem is given to get a benefit from it. In conclusion, it is argued that bad issues in peoples’ lives should be accepted,

while

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others feel that they need to try handling everything and find a solution. I strongly agree with

this

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statement and think that there is no bad

situation

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which we can not cope with.

kalelkkhanaSun May 19 2024

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task achievement

While your task response is strong because you effectively discuss both views and present your own opinion, your main points can be further developed with more specific and diverse examples.

coherence cohesion

Strengthen the coherence and cohesion by ensuring that each paragraph smoothly leads into the next. Additionally, more linking phrases can help in maintaining the logical flow between sentences and paragraphs.

task achievement

Your essay addresses both views on the topic very well, providing a clear opinion in your own perspective.

coherence cohesion

The introduction and conclusion are well-presented, effectively framing your arguments.

11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

345 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

pragmatic approach
mental peace
stoic attitude
proactive measures
personal growth
financial management
sense of accomplishment
resignation
helplessness
stress and burnout
fatalism
collective well-being
self-determination

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