many people believe that it is easier to have a healthy lifestyle in the countryside. others believe that there are health benefits of living cities Discuss both views and give your own opinions.

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It is becoming increasingly prevalent for individuals to hold
a
Correct article usage
the
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view that
people
Use synonyms
living in rural
areas
Use synonyms
will have a healthier
lifestyle
Use synonyms
than
people
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who live in urban
areas
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.
Incontrast
Correct your spelling
In contrast
, sceptics
belive
Correct your spelling
believe
show examples
that there are several health advantages for city inhabitants.
This
Linking Words
writer argues that having a healthy
lifestyle
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is much
more
Change the word
apply
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easier when living in
Use synonyms
countryside
Correct article usage
the countryside
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because of
unpolluted
Correct article usage
the unpolluted
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environment and
freshfood
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fresh food
fresh-food
suppliment
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supplement
. It is vital to understand that there
are
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is
show examples
less pollution in rural
areas
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than
urban
Change preposition
in urban
show examples
ones. To be more specific, the amount of
vehicles'
Fix the agreement mistake
vehicle'
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exhausts
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exhaust
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and
factories'
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factory'
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emissions in the
countryside
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are not as much as
the
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in the
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city's ones
due to
Linking Words
low population density.
As a consequence
Linking Words
, the rural
areas
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will have fresher air and help inhabitants to avoid lung diseases.
Moreover
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,
the
Correct article usage
apply
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agriculture is more developed in the
countryside
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also
Linking Words
agricultural sewages are usually
biodegradeble
Correct your spelling
biodegradable
, so those activities will not lead to pollution and provide
people
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a
Add the preposition
with a
show examples
healthy life.
However
Linking Words
, sceptics believe that urban
areas
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provide citizens
better
Change preposition
with better
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healthcare services.
This
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belief
based
Add a missing verb
is based
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on the
technology
Replace the word
technological
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innovation in medication, there would be more machines and techniques will be possibly invented to cure illness. Not only that, but the hospital along will medical services
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
also
Linking Words
modernized in order to improve human
aminities
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amenities
.
This
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may be true but diseases stem from the harmful
lifestyle
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and pollutants from different sources which
usally
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usually
exist in cities leading to the involvement of various healthcare services. So in the
countryside
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with less pollution will minimize the menace of getting diseases.
This
Linking Words
is the writers' point of view, it is better to live in rural
areas
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because it provides individuals
fresh
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with fresh
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natural
food
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sources.
Explaning
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Explaining
further
Linking Words
,
food
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in
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countryside
Add an article
the countryside
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does not contain any
subtances
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substances
to maintain or enhance the
food
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quality. So on, individuals would not be affected by those poisons, chemicals keeping inhabitants away from sickness and
give
Wrong verb form
giving
show examples
them a healthy life.
According to
Linking Words
a
reasearch
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research
in 2015, the health status and lifespan of
people
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live
Wrong verb form
living
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in
Use synonyms
countryside
Add an article
the countryside
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are higher than
the
Correct determiner usage
that
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urban
Change preposition
of urban
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citizens
due to
Linking Words
the quality of
food
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that they
consumed
Wrong verb form
consume
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throughout their
lifes
Correct your spelling
lives
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.
Thus
Linking Words
, decontaminated nature and fresh
food
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suppliments
Correct your spelling
supplements
supplies
are essential points to be
noticable
Correct your spelling
noticeable
. It should have been demonstrated that it is better to live in
Use synonyms
countryside
Add an article
the countryside
show examples
in
Correct your spelling
order
oder
Correct your spelling
order
to lead a healthy
lifestyle
Use synonyms
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coherence cohesion
Work on improving the logical transitions between paragraphs. Each paragraph should flow smoothly from one to the next. This makes the essay easier to follow and more coherent.
task achievement
Ensure that all points are supported with relevant and specific examples. This helps in strengthening your argument and makes it more convincing.
general
Be mindful of minor grammatical errors and typos as they can detract from the overall quality of your writing. Proofreading can help minimize these issues.
task achievement
The essay effectively presents both sides of the argument, discussing the relative merits of rural and urban lifestyles.
coherence cohesion
Each paragraph is well-structured and contains a main idea supported by additional details, providing clarity to your arguments.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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