Art classes, such as painting and drawing, are as important to a child’s development as other subjects, so it should be compulsory in high schools. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Nowadays,
students
have
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
tend to
studying
Change the verb form
study
show examples
many
subjects
about thinking, logic and which
also
is the most priority
subjects
in high school.
Besides
that,
art
classes
don’t have to
study
Wrong verb form
be studied
show examples
, so
students
cannot develop
Correct pronoun usage
their brain
show examples
brain
Fix the agreement mistake
brains
show examples
efficiently. The writer of
this
essay agrees that
art
classes
should be compulsory in high school. First of all, a
child
will be able to improve
creative
Replace the word
creativity
show examples
if
child
Add an article
a child
show examples
studies painting and drawing.
For instance
, in order to
creating
Change the verb
create
show examples
a picture, they must combine many
combine many
Remove the redundancy
apply
show examples
skills
such
as thinking, observation, etc.
Secondly
, joining
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
an
Correct the article-noun agreement
an art class
art classes
show examples
art
classes
make
Correct subject-verb agreement
makes
show examples
a
child
feel better about
imagine
Wrong verb form
imagining
show examples
. That’s because, some pictures will be created, to be specific, the
child
must use
brain
Add an article
the brain
show examples
for
imagine
Wrong verb form
imagining
show examples
, eyes for observation and after that, drawing carefully to complete the picture. For these reasons, the
child
will have more knowledge and explore experiences, so
who
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
drawing the picture can express children's thoughts and feelings. Studies have shown that
art
make
Change the verb form
makes
show examples
the
child
feel
be
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
entertained and
relax
Wrong verb form
relaxed
show examples
after studying logical
subjects
such
as Math, Physics, etc. That’s because during
time
Add an article
the time
show examples
to learn logical
subjects
, the
students
can
have been
Wrong verb form
be
show examples
stressed and tired,
however
, joining a lesson’s
art
make
Correct subject-verb agreement
makes
show examples
them feel
refresh
Replace the word
refreshed
show examples
mind.
Moreover
, drawing and painting will help to prompt both
left
Correct article usage
the left
show examples
brain
,
right
Correct word choice
and right
show examples
brain
work
Fix the infinitive
to work
show examples
for processing to improve
child’s
Correct article usage
a child’s
show examples
brain
in order to
supporting
Change the verb
support
show examples
in some
subjects
like Math, Chemistry, etc.
Finally
,
learn
Wrong verb form
learning
show examples
an
Correct the article-noun agreement
art classes
an art class
show examples
art
classes
also
help
Correct subject-verb agreement
helps
show examples
the
child
study everything related to architecture. In conclusion, joining
an
Correct the article-noun agreement
an art class
art classes
show examples
art
classes
,
such
as painting and drawing, are as significant for a
child
’s progress
like
Change preposition
as
show examples
other
subjects
,
therefore
, it should be
must
Correct article usage
a must
show examples
in high schools. What a pity, most
students
feel it doesn’t need to study, so the
child
Fix the agreement mistake
children
show examples
cannot take advantage of their brains.
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task achievement
Your essay addresses the prompt and presents a clear opinion. However, your ideas could be developed more comprehensively. More detailed examples and explanations would strengthen your argument.
coherence cohesion
Although your essay does have an introduction and conclusion, they could be more clearly defined and cohesive. Ensure that your introduction sets up your main points effectively and your conclusion summarizes your arguments convincingly.
language accuracy
There are some grammar and vocabulary errors throughout the essay. Careful proofreading and using a wider range of grammatical structures and vocabulary will help improve clarity and readability.
task achievement
Your essay contains relevant points about the benefits of art classes, such as improving creativity and mental relaxation.
coherence cohesion
The essay is structured logically, leading the reader through your points effectively.

Your opinion

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Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

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...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Cognitive development
  • Critical thinking
  • Problem-solving skills
  • Emotional expression
  • Mental health
  • Cultural awareness
  • Diversity and inclusion
  • Fine motor skills
  • Hand-eye coordination
  • Academic performance
  • Artistic engagement
  • Career opportunities
  • Creative fields
  • Graphic design
  • Architecture
  • Game development
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