48.Some people say that outdoor activities benefit children's development rather than computer games. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

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Since the advent of computer

games

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children

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have found an alternative to traditional means of play

such

Linking Words

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

playing outside. Some people believe that playing outside is more

benificial

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beneficial

to a child's

development

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While

Linking Words

video

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games

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can bring temporary enjoyment, I strongly agree that outdoor activities are more

benificial

Correct your spelling

beneficial

to a young

ones

Change to a genitive case

one's

show examples

growth.

This

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eassy

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essay

easy

will discuss why the

benifits

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benefits

of outdoor activities far outweigh

video

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games

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. Playing outside enhances

children

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's physical health and social skills which are necessary for their

development

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For

Linking Words

example

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example,

show examples

playing sports or engaging in playground

games

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helps

children

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develop motor skills, coordination and

overall

Linking Words

fitness.

Linking Words

Additionally

Add a comma

Additionally,

show examples

outdoor play encourages teamwork, communication and social interaction, which are crucial for developing interpersonal skills and building friendships.

Therefore

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, playing outside and interacting with pupils is vital for the youth's

development

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On the other,

video

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games

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have a negative effect on kids' mental and physical

heatlh

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health

For instance

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children

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who play

video

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games

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have a higher chance of developing a sedentary lifestyle which can lead to obesity and health problems.

Furthermore

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, computer

games

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inhibit contact with people in the real world which leads to social awkwardness and difficulty in forming relationships.

Hence

Linking Words

palying

Correct your spelling

playing

spending time hooked to devices and playing

games

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has a widely negative impact on the youth's growth. In conclusion,

while

Linking Words

video

Use synonyms

games

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can be a getaway for many young ones to have fun in alternative ways, they can have many undesirable outcomes on the normal

development

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of a toddler. It is agreed that having

real world

Add a hyphen

real-world

show examples

experiences is more

benificial

Correct your spelling

beneficial

to the normal

development

Use synonyms

of the youth.

James Tue May 21 2024

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coherence cohesion

Work on refining the logical flow of your arguments, ensuring each point transitions smoothly to the next. This will help in making your essay more cohesive.

task achievement

Ensure that all your ideas are fully developed and well-supported with specific examples or evidence. This will make your arguments more compelling,

coherence cohesion

The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, outlining your position clearly and summarizing effectively. This helps to frame your arguments well.

task achievement

Your response addresses the task effectively, discussing both outdoor activities and computer games in relation to children's development.

task achievement

You provided relevant examples to support your arguments, which strengthens your response.

10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
12
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

262 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

benefit
development
physical
promote
foster
social skills
teamwork
cognitive skills
problem-solving
abilities
well-being
hinder
isolation
interpersonal skills
sedentary
exposure
negatively affect
academic performance

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48.Some people say that outdoor activities benefit children's development rather than computer games. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an ageing population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people.

: In today’s world, private companies rather than the government pay for and conduct most scientific research. Do you think the advantages outweigh disadvantages

some people believe that visitors to other countries should follow local customs and behaviour. Others disagree and think the host country should welcome cultural differences. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Research has shown that the transportation of products and people are the main source of pollution. Some people believe the government is responsible for, while others believe it is the fault of individuals. Discuss both view and give your opinion.

More people shop, work and communicate via the internet instead of face-to-face communication. Is it positive or negative?