IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4.5

In the future all cars, buses and trucks will be driverless. The only people travelling inside these vehicles will be passengers.

#future #cars #buses #trucks #driverless #people #vehicles #passengers
In the near future, new
technologies
,
machines
Correct word choice
and machines
show examples
 will be created by humans
such
 as self-driving
cars
.
It is clear that
 there will not be
driver
Add an article
a driver
the driver
show examples
 and passengers will be only travellers in these
cars
. In my opinion, there will be a number of positives
might
Correct pronoun usage
that might
show examples
 outweigh the negatives. If we look at
advantages
Correct article usage
the advantages
show examples
 of that notion, the period is changing day by day and new, comfortable and self-directed
technologies
such
 as
cars
, servant robots and others. Now, the main point towards buses and trucks. If
cars
 are driverless and self-driving, the safety system of the
cars
 will be well considered.
Therefore
,
people
 will reach their destination without high fear and some injuries. Another positive thing is that these self-driving
cars
 and buses will be really comfortable and well-designed for older
people
 because they might encounter some difficulties
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
 driving
cars
.
In addition
, self-driving
cars
 will manage to locate
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
directions without congestion quickly. These are some advantages of these
cars
. If we look at
another sides
Replace the adjective
another side
other sides
show examples
 of that we can see a number of negatives. If some technical issues
are appeared
Change to the active voice
appear
have appeared
show examples
 in the system of
cars
, a number of risks will
be emerged
Change to the active voice
emerge
have emerged
show examples
 and they will be dangerous for human life. It is obvious,
people
Correct word choice
that people
show examples
 have
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 sense of fear and it will affect to
choose
Replace the word
choice
show examples
these
Change preposition
of these
show examples
 types of
cars
such
 as self-driving
cars
.
People
 will reveal their disbelief
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
 these
cars
 and they might reject
to utilize
Verb problem
apply
show examples
them. In conclusion, we will start to face new
technologies
such
 as driverless
cars
, buses,
trucks
Correct word choice
and trucks
show examples
 and they will
be started
Wrong verb form
start
show examples
 to
utilize
Wrong verb form
be utilised
show examples
. I truly support these types of
cars
 and other new and comfortable
technologies
.
Submitted by muxtasar1004 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

complete response
Ensure that your ideas are fully developed and supported with relevant examples. For instance, you could include specific statistics or scenarios to back up your points.
logical structure
Improve the logical flow of your essay. Make sure that each paragraph transitions smoothly into the next one.
introduction conclusion present
The introduction gives a clear opinion on the topic, which sets a good foundation for the essay.
complete response
You have identified both advantages and disadvantages, showing a balanced view on the topic.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • driverless vehicles
  • advantages
  • disadvantages
  • increased safety
  • reduced traffic congestion
  • improved efficiency
  • accessibility
  • disabled
  • elderly
  • job displacement
  • privacy concerns
What to do next:
Look at other essays: