In many contiries today, Crime novels and TV crime drama are becoming more and more popular. Why do you think these books and TV shows are popular? What is your opinion of crime fiction and and TV crime dram as?
In several parts of the world, stories related to crimes are gaining more popularity.
This
is because people
are interested in thrilling and suspenseful aspects of the tales. I am of the opinion that consuming excessive content of these novels and drama shows will have a negative impact on our society.
To embark on, people
are showing more interest in crime-related genres because of their twists and turn
. As there are more unexpected incidents in these narratives Correct subject-verb agreement
turns
people
find it very engaging. It captures audience's
full attention and triggers them to guess the following scenes. Correct article usage
the audience's
Also
, many Television channels broadcast series and movies based on illegal acts to create awareness amongst
the citizens. Change preposition
among
For example
, a show called "Prison" depicts the life of prisoners inside the jail in real-time
. Once, individuals are aware of how miserable life is inside detention centres, they will have second thoughts before attempting any sort of crime or illegal act.
Having said that, I Correct your spelling
real time
also
believe watching and reading this
type of content will have an adverse effect on people
's psychology. As they continually see and hear about subjects related to offence, their brain triggers to
try out the same scenarios in their life for excitement purposes. Correct pronoun usage
them to
Thus
destructing
Verb problem
destroying
people
's relationships with their peers. For example
, young adults who watch more of
fighting sequences tend to imitate their superheroes and end up hurting each other. Change preposition
apply
In addition
, these series are addictive in nature. Hence
, people
can not concentrate on other work and become a couch potato.
To put it in a nutshell, overconsuming anything is bad and will have a detrimental effects
on oneself and on others. Even though it might create awareness among citizens, watching in moderation is highly advisable to create a harmonious society.Correct the article-noun agreement
a detrimental effect
detrimental effects
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language
Be mindful of minor language errors: While overall your language is clear and comprehensible, minor errors, such as 'contiries,' 'drama shows,' and 'destructing' can affect the smooth flow of your essay. Proofreading can help catch these mistakes.
task response
Ensure a more balanced perspective: While you discussed the negative impacts of crime fiction and TV crime dramas, considering any possible positive societal impacts could provide a more well-rounded argument.
introduction
Engaging introduction: Your introductory paragraph clearly outlines the topic and gives a strong thesis on the negative impact of crime novels and TV shows.
structure
Clear structure: You have a coherent and logical structure, with clear topic sentences that introduce each paragraph's main point. This helps readers follow your argument easily.
examples
Use of examples: You included relevant examples, such as the TV show 'Prison,' that help illustrate your points. This adds depth and context to your arguments.
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite