IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The chart below shows the total number of minutes (in billion) of telephone calls in the UK, divided into three categories, from 1995-2002.

The chart below shows the total number of minutes (in billion) of telephone calls in the UK, divided into three categories, from 1995-2002.
#minutes #billion #telephone #uk #three #categories
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The graph illustrates the total
minutes
 of consumption on telephone calls in three different categories, namely local-fixed
line
, national and international-fixed
line
 and
mobiles-all
Correct your spelling
mobile-all
show examples
 calls, in the UK, between 1995 and 2002.
Overall
, over the
7 years
Correct your spelling
7-year
 period,
although
 local calls conserved their popularity,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
spending time on other calls
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
show examples
 an upward
trend
.
In particular
, using mobile phones increased significantly.
At
Change the preposition
In
show examples
 the beginning, in 1995, using the phone which has
fixed
Correct article usage
a fixed
show examples
line
 for local communication was the most popular preference among
public
Add an article
the public
show examples
,
just
Change preposition
with just
show examples
 over 70
billion
minutes
 and demonstrated an upward
trend
. Even though
this
trend
 peaked in 1998 (at 90
billion
minutes
), there was a decrease over the next three years and the total number of
minutes
 was almost equivalent
with
Change preposition
to
show examples
initial
Add an article
the initial
an initial
show examples
 value.
On the other hand
, national and international use of
fixed
Add a hyphen
fixed-line
show examples
line
phone
Fix the agreement mistake
phones
show examples
 had a significant value with 37
billion
minutes
 and soared steadily about by 23
billion
minutes
,
this
 upward
trend
 is
also
 valid for the figures
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
 mobiles, especially, after 1999, using mobile phone for calls increased sharply from roughly 14 to 45
billion
minutes
.
Submitted by kulabermuh on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words minutes, line, trend, billion with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "trend" was used 4 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "significantly" was used 2 times.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Telecommunications
  • Long-distance calls
  • Local calls
  • International calls
  • Duration
  • Fluctuation
  • Incline/Decline
  • Significant
  • Trend
  • Statistical data
  • Billion
  • Minutes
  • Graph/chart interpretation
  • Incremental growth
  • Stabilize
  • Peak
  • Dip
  • Plummet
What to do next:
Look at other essays: